Excuses we’ve all used to miss class and trick our professors

You’ve definitely done most of these

College students are pretty lucky. Never again will we be able to drink so much on our parents’ dimes, sleep in on Saturday, or study something new everyday. But sometimes, going to class isn’t on the menu.

Maybe it’s because you wasted time doing nothing, aka binge watching Netflix, instead of doing your homework. Or maybe you couldn’t make the deadline for an assignment and bravely decided to ditch class last minute. If you have, chances are you’ve used one of these excuses and if you tell yourself you haven’t, you’re probably lying.

Sent a (really bad) lie

Lying is bad. But let’s face it, we’ve all done it. Honesty should be the best policy, but with brutal professors sometimes we have to take the Pinocchio route. Desperate times call for desperate measures!

‘Family emergency’

Of course, real family emergencies are nothing to joke about, but this is definitely a go-to excuse for most students. Professors can’t argue with you about a ‘family emergency,’ it’s the silent “no questions asked” response.

The ‘NYU Classes is down’ excuse

In reality, NYU is generally on top of their shit so I’d be surprised if NYU classes actually were down. Not to mention how aggressive that email notification for assignment submission is, or the bold red announcement that your assignment is late. NYU classes is angsty as fuck so although this is a super tempting excuse, it’s also pretty risky.

Blame it on shitty WiFi

“Blame it on WiFi, got you feelin loose.” It’s certainly more likely for the NYU wifi to be down than NYU classes, and we millennials would rather die than lose our WiFi connection. Don’t forget, we’re a generation of social media fiends. This excuse is a bit of a stretch given the access to Wifi around the city, but with a relaxed professor, it will probably get you off the hook for a while.

Lie about your personal life

This is a ballsy call of desperation. As if it’s not embarrassing enough to overshare with a professor, you’ll also have to put up with their pity. But if you can handle that, this is probably the excuse you for you.

Submit the “wrong” assignment

The classic “wrong” essay. Maybe you accidentally uploaded the file for your freshman year ‘Writing the Essay’ paper instead of the one for ‘Texts and Ideas’? It’s a pretty blatant lie, but how can your professor prove that you did it on purpose? Answer: they can’t.

Faked sickness

“I’m sick” is the oldest excuse in the book, but beware because many professors will ask for a note from the health center. Better save this for when you’re actually sick, and don’t show up to the health center faking it because they will catch you and charge you that annoying $10 walk-in fee.

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