Why Notre Dame friendships are way better than high school

I remember sitting at a New Year’s party my senior year of high school with my group of  close friends discussing college plans.

At the time, we all had no idea what we were going to do, but we all made a pact to continue to be friends no matter what path we took. Two years ago, this felt like a reality.

Now, as I am at my house over break, just minutes away from those I was so close to in high school, I feel no desire to rekindle what was so great at the time.

I know it sounds harsh, and I know a lot of people who are just as close with their high school friends as they were during the awkward years.

Maybe some aren’t as extreme as me, who nearly performs a tuck-and-roll behind a display of cantaloupe in the grocery store so as to avoid just saying a mere “Hi” to someone I used to know.

For a variety of reasons, the relationships I have formed at Notre Dame are infinitely stronger than those I formed throughout my high school years.

It is not easy to pinpoint a singular reason behind this notion.

Anyone merely glancing at the situation would probably guess that these relationships are stronger just because I live with these people. I don’t discard this argument. I see my closest friends most days, whether it be just for a meal or to hang out on the weekends. I don’t ever see my friends from high school except for when I’m home, and the lack of a physical connection definitely makes the relationship weaker as a whole.

However, I feel like the strength of a college friendship is much more than just a physical closeness.

For me, high school always seemed like an extended competition with the final prize being acceptance into college. I felt like I could never be happy for the successes of my peers because it meant that they offered me a stiffer competition. If someone got accepted to a certain college, your chances of getting into the same college were lessened.

Notre Dame has a completely different environment.

I’m not saying that it isn’t competitive, for most academic environments are structured with some underlying competitive nature. Although Notre Dame has the competitive academic environment, people support each other’s successes, no matter how small.

Here, the end goal is employment. If someone gets an internship or a job before you, there are still bountiful opportunities for you to find employment. Notre Dame students, I find, truly understand this concept.

My friends at Notre Dame are from a variety of backgrounds. I met them in class, through my extracurricular activities, or even by chance. But the amazing thing is that I am proud of everything that they do on a daily basis. You got an A on that super hard test? Let’s celebrate! You actually got up for your 8:20 class this morning? Let’s celebrate! You didn’t get up for your 8:20 class but got the notes from someone who actually did? Let’s celebrate!

I never feel the need to compare myself to my peers and friends at Notre Dame because my future does not rely on someone else. Unlike in high school when striving to be the best was the only goal, now striving to be my own best is the only goal.

Once everyone realizes this, the relationships we build are those rooted in support and love, not in competition.

Over break, I traveled for multiple hours to New York City to see my friends from Connecticut, Pennsylvania, and New Jersey who all go to Notre Dame.

I have still yet to see any of my friends from high school over this break, and I’m okay with that. Yes, I don’t have yearly New Year’s reunion parties to look forward to, but I have love and support froman amazing group of friends.

And that’s better than anything else.