Why is it so hard to ask for help?

In order to get through a single day, we naturally block out all the bad in the world. If horrible things such as murder, abuse, sexual harassment, and suicide were always at the front of our minds, we wouldn’t be able to get out of bed. Whatever the prominent bad is in your life, more often than not we push that out of our minds, suppressing it long enough to forget about it so we can enjoy the good in the world.

The problem with suppressing things, though, is that it will all come back at once. The pain comes in waves. When it comes, the only thing you can do is let the wave wash over you and wait until you are able to come up for air again.

If there’s one thing I have learned at my time here at UMich, it’s to force myself to seek help on the days when the waves feel never-ending. Luckily for us students, UMich is here to help. CAPS – Counseling and Psychological Services – is committed to providing a free outlet for students who are struggling with their mental health. The only problem? Getting there is the hardest part.

The amount of times I have walked up the stairs of the Union to the third floor to stand in front of this board is immeasurable.

I stand, attempting to muster up the courage to walk through the door, just to turn around and get Panda Express instead. CAPS can be a scary place. Asking for help is hard. Talking about the bad is painful. Forcing yourself to believe that there is hope that can be found through that door is difficult. But you must take action. You must force yourself to sit in this waiting room and repeat to yourself that help is on its way. Because it is.

There is always hope. Hope comes in all different shapes and sizes, in different settings, people, situations. Hope can be found in a cup of coffee, in a car ride with a friend, in the lyrics of a song. Hope will hit you unexpectedly. Even when you feel as though it will never come, it always does. And when it does, hold onto it with all you have. If you look hard enough, hope can be found everywhere.

We do what we can to get by. But sometimes, a little bit of help will go a long way. Even in the darkest of states, there is a sliver of good that we have to hold onto in order to stay in this world. We all have to start somewhere, and maybe the best place to do that is through the door of our very own CAPS.