The types of drivers you encounter at FSU

Florida State is the best school because we have plenty of parking *cough cough*. Lets face it, if you have ever driven on FSU’s campus, you know that parking sucks, traffic sucks, and that our school is in great need of a 10-story expansion onto the Traditions Way parking garage. The FSU app is helpful by showing students how full every garage is, but depending on the type of driver YOU are, you choose whether or not to listen.

The “I WILL find a spot” driver

Now, if you’re like me, you like to keep your car close to you and you refuse on parking far away. I personally am the “If I drive around and look hard enough, I can and WILL find a spot” type of driver. I never look at the app because, allow me to quote Spongebob, ‘I know deep down that if I believe in myself, and with a tiny pinch of magic, all of my dreams will come true’.

The “I’ll just check the app” driver

Some of the more responsible drivers like to stay out of the heat of traffic and check the app, which will then dictate which garage they choose. If you are this person, congratulations! You are smart! Gold Star for you!

The “lurker”

There are those student drivers who take the not-so-orthodox approach to parking in a busy a garage. They pull into a restricted spot by the staircases to the parking garages, turn on their hazards, sit, and wait for someone to walk out of the door. Immediately after they find a person walking to their car, they start their engine and follow the person like a wild-cat stalking its prey. These are the lurkers of the FSU garages, and if you aren’t running late, its not all that bad of a technique to parking.

The “I don’t give a f*ck” driver

These are the types of people no one likes. They are in a rush and don’t care about you — they’re are rude, reckless, and uncaring. These are the people that don’t care, they don’t even bother looking for a spot, they just park in faculty parking and let the citations pile up.

For these types of people, curbs are fair game, grass is fair game, basically anything that isn’t developed they see as a “parking spot.” Remember: NO ONE likes these types of drivers. Please, we beg of you, do not become this type of driver. Citations are not fun. Just think about what that $30 could have gone to if you didn’t waste it on a parking spot.

The “I’m not going ANYWHERE” driver

This person will park in the busiest parking garage and do anything and everything on their to do list before they have to leave. They will walk to their car, get in, turn on the air conditioning, and do anything else they could possibly do while sitting with their reverse lights on the entire time, totally oblivious to the 97 students with their blinkers on trying to fight for that one precious parking spot.

While driving on campus, there are many types of drivers that you’ll encounter. So, which kind are you? Are you “that guy”?