Everything you’ll know if you grew up a Laguna kid

I grew up in Laguna Beach, California. You may know it from the infamous “Laguna Beach Show,” from a sunny family vacation, or you may have no idea where this place is.

If you’d like a quick description of Laguna, just think of every Southern California stereotype you’ve ever heard and imagine building a small beach town out of them.

Laguna Beach is a surreal place to live. Life is simple and easy yet still so exciting. From the outside looking in, we do affirm a pretty ridiculous number of California stereotypes. But, to us, the beach, the sunny days, the surfer slang, and the chill vibe are all part of growing up a Laguna kid.

Laguna kids use surfer slang in everyday conversation, and it’s not even weird

Since I left home I’ve had to eliminate “gnarly” and “wicked” from my vocabulary because East Coast people can’t take me seriously. I manage to slip “bummer” and “dank” into convos occasionally but it’s still risky. In Laguna, it’s just acceptable slang.

If you don’t know secret beach spots you aren’t a real Laguna kid

We’ll go far out of our way to avoid sunburnt tourists. They get in the way of surfers and skimmers and generally just don’t know how to handle the ocean. So if you grew up in Laguna, you know which beaches are local and which aren’t. You’ve probably been to the secret pools by Thousand Steps, or climbed your way to Pirate’s Cove, or maybe you’re super local and know of places I haven’t even heard of. But the one rule we all know is that you never, ever, go to Main Beach. Never.

Acai bowls and Mexican food are “in”

If you don’t like giant burritos and fancy berries get out. Banzai Bowls is the only acceptable after-beach snack. It started as a health craze and became a habit. Now it’s been proven that bowls of sugary fruit aren’t that good for you but that fact is easy to ignore. And Active Culture isn’t too far off if you’re looking to be healthy for the day.

Our Mexican food is as close as it comes to the real thing, considering we’re a short trip from the border. It makes Mexican food in most other states seem basically inedible. I can pretty easily say that burritos and tacos are a staple in the diet of most Laguna residents. If you haven’t been to Papa’s Tacos yet, you haven’t lived.

We’ve all had a traumatic near-drowning experience because the waves are ridiculous

If not one, then probably more like ten. Most of us spent our childhood as a junior lifeguard running around Anita Street or Thalia and still can’t handle the ocean. There’s always an intense moment of panic as you turn around and realize a big ass wave is about to crash and you can’t dive under it in time. This is followed by a slow motion run towards it and an attempt to dive under, only to find yourself sucked backwards and slapped around by whitewash. It’s probably a very similar feeling to being inside a washing machine.

 You’re so chill that non-Californians will get annoyed with how calm you are all the time

Apparently we give off a very “California” vibe. Not to say that everyone in Laguna is the same way, but the majority of us are more laid back than the rest of the world. Honestly, you’d practically have to hit me with a car to actually make me mad. To some people it comes off as not caring, but we do care. It’s just hard to be upset when you live in such a beautiful place.

Learning to drive was absolutely terrifying 

PCH is the highway straight out of any student driver’s nightmare. It’s made up of small lanes lined closely on either side by parked cars whose doors open swing open without warning. Mix this with clueless pedestrians, parallel parking, and bad out-of-state drivers… and there you have Laguna’s section of Pacific Coast Highway. If you can drive in that, you can drive in anything. Oh, and we hate when you try to parallel park along the highway. Just don’t do it, you will get honked at.

You have about a ten-degree range of comfort with weather

You may have noticed that those of us who grew up in Southern California don’t leave it. This is because we can’t survive the weather anywhere else. My personal range of comfort is from 70 to 80 degrees, anywhere outside this range and it is guaranteed that I will complain. There are approximately 281 sunny days every year in Laguna. The other days are slightly cloudy, and maybe 8 are rainy. My point being: we’re spoiled.