I am not afraid of being Hispanic in this nation anymore

Being a part of a minority our new president is taking rights away from, it’s discouraging and heart-breaking. The campus climate in Madison has changed drastically. Since the man in charge can say offensive things, some of my classmates also think saying abusive and hurtful things are OK.  Hearing him say he wants to build a wall between the two countries genetically a part of me is frustrating, but I’m growing up and truly trying to understand my culture more than ever.

I am no longer ashamed of being what defies me.

I am proud to be a Mexican-American citizen

Growing up with my a white mom and a Mexican dad, I would say I grew up familiar with both of my backgrounds. I remember playing Spanish-learning computer games my parents bought me, and I could pick up Spanish from my dad when he spoke it around the house.

My mom would buy me Sprite, my dad would buy me Jarritos. He would make us tortillas and refried beans, and my mom would make us mac n’ cheese. I would hear songs in Spanish from my dad, but English from my mom.

I remember strangers, even sometimes my own friends, making racist jokes about ‘jumping over the boarder’ or calling me ‘ese’. Though I knew they didn’t mean it and I would laugh it off, it still hurt.

There were times when I heard someone indirectly generalize my race as ‘dirty Mexicans’ and ‘jumping beans’.

I quickly became embarrassed of my background and wanted nothing to do with it. On surveys or applications, I would strictly check the ‘caucasian’ box and disregard the ‘hispanic/latino’ box. I didn’t want people to know I was Mexican.

It wasn’t until my senior year in high school when I finally took pride in being Mexican. Although there have been several negative reactions, they shouldn’t make me ashamed of who I am.

I’ve been repeatedly called something in college I’ve never been called before:

A spic

Never did I think I would be called out because of my race, especially at Madison and at the UW. UW-Madison is a very liberal school and tries to defend their students in every way possible. But there are so many things that their eyes miss.

Never in my whole life have I been called a spic, and I’ve been called it four times in just a couple months. Every time, I didn’t know how to respond.  I still didn’t know how to respond to it, till now.

I want to say it didn’t hurt me and I’ve moved past it, but it did and I haven’t.

To the pretentious people that had the audacity to call me and others a contemptuous word because of our heritage, I and the rest of us truly feel bad for you.

We are sorry you’re not educated or capable enough to think of any other word, and you have to result to an offensive word. We are sorry for whatever you’re going through.  You have to put others down for what they can’t help, you must be going through so much.

We promise we won’t hold grudges, but we’re more than just a name.

Sincerely,

Proud Mexicans/Latinos(as) everywhere