Everything USC students need to stop doing

Ever heard of a flush?

Robert Maclay Widney, USC’s main founder, didn’t work tirelessly to start USC for students to walk down the wrong side of the stairwell or scream at you on Trousdale when they’re tabling.

Heres a list of shit the meme loving, acai bowl eating and over achieving USC student body needs to stop doing for the sake of the Trojan Family.

Taking a whole table for themselves when there is absolutely nowhere to sit

Oh, you need a table for you, your backpack, your apple and your computer charger?! Is there an imaginary friend sitting next to you I don’t know about?

I promise you nothing will happen if someone comes and sits with you on a table made for 8. You might even make a friend.

Not staying in the biking lane

Bikers, I’m sorry if I’m the first person to break it to you, but pedestrians hate you. Yes, all of them. Ever heard of a bike lane? USC literally imbedded a LANE for you riders to bike in so you don’t crash into our innocent souls… or each other. Walking from GFS to THH isn’t so far.  But no, you still all choose to ride around campus 20 mph as if USC is a year-long bike marathon.

Pretending they don’t know your name

Whether it was a drunk encounter on frat row, a GE during freshman year, or a mutual friend’s introduction- you’ve spoken to me. You know my name. You even followed me on Instagram. We’re adults now, which means its no longer cool to play the”sorry, whats your name again?” game with people you’re already friends with on Facebook.

Opening really intense-smelling food during class

SERIOUSLY?! I’m already nauseous sitting through this class, but now I think I’m going to be sick. That Tasty video you tried to recreate in your kitchen has no place in this 20-person discussion period. I totally thought this was my BAUD 307 class, not a fish market. Unleash your stench-filled container outside and spare us the odor.

Taking the elevator up one floor 

Trust me, we all have those days. But when it’s 7:59 and you’re running late to your 8:00 class on the 4th floor, the last thing you need is someone to come into elevator and push “2.” 29 steps won’t kill you.

Here’s to us, Trojans.

Baby steps.

University of Southern California