I took an App State hipster to a Tar Heel tailgate
And she was way harsh
My self-proclaimed angsty friend Emily – a member of a “free-thinking” Living-Learning community at Appalachian State – visited UNC for Saturday’s football game. I had the bright idea of taking her to a fraternity tailgate.
Her reaction? “Why the hell are we doing this?”
Emily is a member of the Watauga Living Learning Community at App State, which dedicates itself to promoting individual creativity and diverse thinking.
The community involves an entire program of unique classes—from “Survival Skills” to “Becoming Chinese”. They also have weird-ass social events like “Hair Feast” – where attendees literally wear food in their hair while others walk by and eat it.
Even all that diverse thinking couldn’t have prepared her for the fraternity fashion trends.
Emily said: “Why the fuck are they all wearing white New Balances? Don’t they have money to buy nicer shoes? My dad doesn’t even wear those.”
I try to describe their functionality, but she isn’t having it.
“Una, you can’t make those look good with khakis.”
Another no-go: Duck boots.
“At App we use those for real things, like snow or hiking. Not stepping over puddles or our friend’s pile of vomit.”
Harsh.
We took a step inside to use the restroom. A disturbed Emily realized there was no doorknob on the door. She looked in the grimy mirror.
More impressed by the huge living rooms and the fact that around 20 boys lived in the house, Emily warmed up to the fact that it could be cool to live in a fraternity house.
“There would just be parties like all the time.”
She was also impressed by their recycling bins, and she drew comparisons to her hippie LLC back at App.
“It feels like home.”
Listening to Queen blaring on in the background, we finished our drinks as we watched pledges in sport jackets struggle to mount the TV on the wall.
Emily said: “You know Una, I think this is the most fraternity thing I’ve seen all day.”
Life, liberty, and the pursuit of sports television.