‘You’re never alone here’: Temple students share their message of hope after Dalcourt’s death

In the United States, suicide is the leading cause of death among college and university students, according to the Suicide Prevention Resource Center.

On Tuesday, October 3, 2017, the Temple community lost a fellow Owl when Richard Dalcourt fell from his 1940 residence hall window. This was ruled as a suicide by the Philadelphia Department of Health.

Many of us were shocked to learn of his passing, but suicide and mental health among college students is a topic we cannot ignore any longer, especially in freshmen.

While some of us are enjoying college, there are students who are struggling by themselves and need to know that they are never alone at a university as large as ours.

The Tab Temple asked students for their message of solidarity and hope for any Temple student who may think they are alone.

"In my first couple weeks here, I was honestly miserable. I felt like I was the only one not totally loving college. I felt like I was doing something wrong because college wasn’t this crazy new thing that I fell completely in love with.

But when my floor started getting together and gradually got closer, I felt a million times more comfortable. Now we keep our doors open and a group of us hang out almost every night and just talk about everything and anything." –Rachel Shelley, 1940 resident

"Sometimes it will seem daunting to ask for help, whether it’s from a professional or just a friend. It’s hard to show that you’re feeling weak and defeated. I’ve been there and I remember the moment when I started to think and even convince myself that my life was not worth living anymore. I remember wanting to die. I thought of so many ways to do it. I can absolutely sympathize with anybody who feels that way now. But even on those darkest days, when your mind tells you that you can’t be fixed, it will pass. I promise you. I promise you. It will pass and you will become stronger than you ever thought was possible. Reaching out is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength. And hope. I encourage you to speak up. No matter who you talk to, it will help.

Let somebody in because you do NOT have to deal with your demons alone. One person can make a world of a difference. Even if it’s a stranger. You are strong, you are worthy, you are loved. Don’t you dare let yourself think otherwise." –Garine Rosette, Senior

"During my freshman year, I felt alone almost everyday. I was one of the few people of color in my residence hall, and in all of my classes. I didn't feel included and as a result, I went into solitude. When I got involved, I found my community, I found that their were so many people on this campus who genuinely cared about me and made me feel valued. If I can say anyone who is feeling similar to how I felt my freshman year, please don't be afraid to reach out and ask for help.

When I asked for help, it saved my life in more ways than I can imagine. And the people who were there for me are the reason I am able to be President today. It's okay not to always be okay. What's important is learning when to ask someone for help. So please do. Reach out to TSG, your RA, resident director, parents, friends, and even Tuttleman Counseling. What ever you do, make sure you get yourself the help you need. It'll make a world of difference" –Tyrell Mann-Barnes, Senior

"Sometimes people do not realize how much a smile, a wave, or a kind gesture can mean to someone. It is important that we show our fellow students and the public that Temple University is an accepting campus full of generous people and helpful resources. If you are ever struggling physically, emotionally, or mentally, just know that there is someone out there probably going through the same thing. As hard as it may be, try to stay strong and remember that you are not alone. Listen to your favorite song, call your friend from home or a family member, and breathe. You are here for a reason and you are important. Never forget that." –Lisa Cunningham, Sophomore

"I know that it is hard. The work is hard, the social life is hard, and it's easy to feel alienated and overwhelmed. But, you never know when an amazing thing is coming. There is pain in life because of how unpredictable it is, but there is also joy in life because of how unpredictable it is. Hold on for the joy." –Jacqui Fricke, Junior

"Temple has a community of students that genuinely care about each other. Rather that be a friend, mentor, or TSG, I encourage every student to know that they have someone they can talk to. As an Owl, you're never in this alone. If students ever need anything, I want them to feel comfortable knowing that we care and we listen." –Kayla Martin, Senior

"There is nothing wrong with being alone. I'd say there is nothing wrong with feeling alone either, but I always think back to what is taught to us at convocation. That is that as a university we don't look to our right, and our left with the belief that one of the people sitting next to us won't return the following year. Rather we look at our peers believing that all of us will be sitting in the Liacouras Center on graduation day, and it's on us to ensure we make it happen. I know for a long time sat at home alone on a Saturday or Friday night and questioned if Temple was right for me. Some people are lucky and know it is the day they step on campus, and others it may take a semester, but there is a community for everyone here. Temple as a whole wouldn't be as great without the niche groups of people who add to the diverse population." –Tyler Lum, Sophomore

“One of my favorite books to read to my nephew is about a family of owls, one night they get separated from their parents, working together they learn to fly and eventually are reunited. I can’t think of a better allegory for Temple, we are a family of almost 40,000 and we all learn, love and live together. So when it gets hard, know that you have 39,999 others to look to, to come alongside you and to help you soar.” –Jacob Kurtz, Sophomore

"I remember opening up to my best friend about how hard college was and how dark life can feel sometimes. I was shocked when she said she felt the same way. But it reminded me that even though I feel alone sometimes, so have others and that hard times will always pass. As humans we never experience anything that another person hasn't already. And the amazing thing is that the light always comes. Life will be dark and then it will be light again. I promise it does get better, no matter how bleak or hopeless it may look now. And always, always reach out to people. It's hard. It can mean being very vulnerable, but that's how we grow forward and move on to the better things, by going through life together. When I am sad, I tend to shut people out. But I've learned that it's during those times that I need people the most. I think the only way to live an emotionally and mentally healthy life is to surround yourself with a good community. Be intentional about finding good friends that you can rely on and live life with." –Sierra Guenst, Senior

"When I first came to Temple I was extremely overwhelmed. Being the first person to go out of state from my family, I felt endless pressure to prove that I had made the right decision in choosing Temple. I had a hard time finding people who I could relate and understand me. I never shared my struggles because I felt lost and didn’t know what to do. All it took was a fellow owl who encouraged me to pursue the things I never had the confidence to try. I was able to ask for help and ultimately find a home in Temple. It wasn’t a big gesture, but it changed my life in ways they may never know.

We often take for granted the fact that every smile, every compliment, every conversation, every acknowledgement can mean the world to someone. As Owls, it is our job to show that we are committed to our community and we are here to support each other. For those who are feeling overwhelmed, tired, or lost please know that – whether it be through Tuttleman, Residential Life, TSG, organizations, administrators, family, or friends, there are plenty of resources here to support you through your journey." –Almas Ayaz, Junior

You are never alone at Temple University. Please know that there are faculty members, administrators, and students who will be there for you.

Students should not hesitate to reach Tuttleman Counseling Services, which are available at 1700 N. Broad Street or at 215-204-7276 and the National Suicide Hotline can be reached at 1-800-273-8255

If you want to add your own message to this article, please email [email protected] and we'll be happy to add it in.

@gailvivarx3