What can you buy with Kent’s salary?

212,056 mixed drinks or 106,028 doubles at Chucks (RIP sweet angel)

Recently, the “Chronicle of Higher Education” released stats ranking how much every president of each college in America makes every year.

Our dearest Chancellor Kent Syverud rolls in at number 60 out of 510 with his yearly salary of $848,225. Now, there are some Presidents that make over $1 million every year, but regardless, as a college student with a minimal paycheck, I’m so green with envy I’m putting the Wicked Witch to shame.

And, just in case job searching hasn’t gotten you sad enough, no, none of us will ever have a pay check like that. But as it’s summer, let’s imagine the possibilities of getting a paycheck like that. You could…

Buy 8,482 bottles of wine at Harry’s

 

Like, actual rose all day

Buy 212,056 mixed drinks or 106,028 doubles at Chucks (RIP sweet angel)

gone but never 4gotten

Buy about 121,175 chicken tender meals at Kimmel

so. many. tenders.

Buy 318,881 medium Dunkin’ Donuts iced coffees 

for when you’re running 20 min late to class and need to stop at Schine

77,181 large cheese pizzas from Domino’s

gotta get that D (with infinite cheesy bread forever)

Probably get literally any teacher to give you an A

fuck you all nighters

Get a literal lifetime of $10 SU shirts from that place on Marshall Street (84,822 shirts in case you wanted an exact number)

New tailgate, new shirt amiright?

1,326,387 wings from Acropolis

lylylylyyyy

About 122,222 regular sandwiches from Pita Pit.

drunk or sober, Pita Pit is the 1 4 me

Depending on your meat, roughly 79,645 Chipotle burrito bowls with Chips and Guac, because when you’re that rich, you can actually afford to get guacamole.

still wouldn’t be enough, tbh

Most importantly, in a world where tuition doesn’t get raised every single year, you could go to SU for 13 whole years, as if that’s long enough for any of us.

Care to share the love to some of your favorite broke, dear orange friends, @Kent?

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