Finals week, only the strong will survive
And those who have Adderall for breakfast, lunch, and dinner
Brace yourself, finals are coming. Or maybe they’ve already come if you have an especially vindictive professor.
Either way, The Tab has prepared a survival guide full of websites and advice for both you and your grades (and if all else fails, check out this article to find out where you should cry).
Studivation
Infinite Jukebox – Make your favorite song last forever, just like those studio classes.
Site Blockers – The only thing that makes studying better is not being able to take internet breaks.
Pro-Tip: If you literally chain yourself to a desk at Bird, they can’t kick you out.
Grade Savers
PaperRater – No, the essay you wrote at 3am while you were blackout drunk will not actually help your grade.
Kahn Academy – He actually knows what he’s doing, and unlike most teachers, you can make him go over a complicated concept as many times as you need.
Pro-Tip: Sleep with Smarties under your pillow, it will make you smart through osmosis. If you don’t know what “osmosis” is, you should actually study.
Life Savers
Animal Webcams – See what your life could be like if you were cute, furry, and didn’t have to take finals.
Fuck It All Song – When you just really need to sing about how you feel
Pro-Tip: C’s and D’s get the degree.
And if absolutely everything has gone wrong, make a cuddle puddle with your friends. The tears will make a waterfall and wash away all the red pen on your final, so you can pretend you got an A.
🎶 Don’t go chaaaasin’ waterfalls 🎶
Happy Studying Orange Friends!