The RU survival guide to Halloweekend
Don’t leave the party with the guy in the mask – just in case he takes it off and is scarier looking underneath it
It’s that time of year again, and a couple of really fun, unexplainable nights are ahead of us. Whether you’re going as a cat, a superhero, or Harley Quinn, there are many things you need to keep in mind while navigating this Halloween season. Surviving Halloweekend is crucial so you can post all of your cute pictures, Snapchat everything that is happening and live to tell your entertaining stories afterwards. Otherwise, what is the point? Here is how you can make it through the next few days without making an idiot of yourself, having regrets, or getting left behind:
Enjoy a good pre-game so you can forget how stupid you look in your costume
That’s right ladies, just enough pre-game to feel super cute in your ridiculous superwoman costume, but not so much that you think it actually makes you fly. (Or in my case, so you can forget your friends wrapped you in caution tape).
Don’t dress as a clown
But do dress as anything else… for obvious reasons. (However if you do choose to dress as a clown, everyone else has permission to throw their drinks at you).
Don’t leave the party with the guy in the mask
Just in case he takes it off and is scarier looking underneath it.
If you’re Harley Quinn, carry a bat
Just in case you see an idiot dressed as a clown
Don’t wear spike heels
You’ll either end up barefoot, in constant pain, or eating shit at least once by the end of the night (I’m talking from experience). Plus, it’s harder to run away if anything goes wrong.
Stay away from anyone dressed like Trump
Especially the ladies dressed as cats. He likes to ‘grab ’em by the pussy.”‘
And stay away from anyone dressed like Bill Clinton
Remember, he really likes interns.
If you need a last minute costume, throw on a little black dress with some ears
Don’t even bother drawing on whiskers or buying a tail. The ears are enough. You’re totally a cat.
Bring a water bottle
I don’t care what you put in it, just make sure you have one.
No pain, no gain
Commit to those short-shorts and fishnet stockings: this is the price you pay for looking good.
Stay together, and have fun
Halloween is all about the treats anyway.