10 hook-up tips no one taught you before college

Believe me, I was once as clueless as you

Before college I had only had two serious boyfriends, and kissed five different boys. At the time, I thought I knew a lot and had loads of experience, but in reality I had no idea.

I was still clutching my V-card as if it were the only determining factor of my dignity. Now, as a sophomore, I still don’t have a buttload (an actual metric unit) of experience, but I do have a lot of friends, so I asked them for their hookup tips, and this is what they had to say.

If you don’t like the person you are hooking up with as more than a hook up, let them know

If you only want to be friends, tell them. If you want to be more than friends, tell them. If you never want to see them again, tell them. Communication is key. It isn’t fair to lead someone on, and though it might be uncomfortable, it saves everyone a lot of heartache.

Ghosting is a super shitty thing to do, so instead of being a garbage-person, just let them know how you feel. Being honest is way more mature and cool than taking the easy way out – dragging someone along behind you.

Be respectful of your partner’s body

Obviously you’re attracted to this person if you’re getting intimate, but they might not be exactly what you expect. Guys: don’t judge a girl if she has hairy legs or a push-up bra. Girls: It really is about the way they use it (not the size), and not every guys is circumcised. Scrutinizing your partner’s body is something you should, at the very least, keep to yourself.

Change your bed sheets

If you do end up bringing someone back, dirty bed sheets can be a real turn off. Imagine having this beautiful person in your bed, and then making them lay on a pillow you’ve drooled on for the last six weeks, in sheets caked with your night sweats.

Even if you don’t anticipate bringing anyone back to your room ever, change them every few weeks. Everything about having clean sheets is beneficial; it really doesn’t take that long to do, and it’s much more hygienic.

Don’t feed someone drinks so you can hookup with them

I hate that I have to say this, but it is true on both sides. I know both guys and girls who have had someone do it to them. More than creepy, it’s totally violating. If someone doesn’t want to hook up with you, whether they’re sober or buzzed, leave them alone.

If a person is visibly under the influence, do talk to them, but don’t hook up with them. If you really like them that much, get their number, and try again when they aren’t blitzed.

Protect yourself, effectively

Double bagging it doesn’t work, so don’t try it. Do use a condom that fits, even if she’s on birth control. Unless you are each other’s steady partner, wrap it so you don’t get an STD or STI.

If you decide not to use a condom, pull out, even if she’s on birth control. When taken correctly, most BC pills are 99% effective, but if even one pill is missed, the effectiveness goes down the tubes. Better to be safe than sorry.

Don’t be afraid to use lube

There is nothing wrong with needing a little extra help to get you or your partner into the moment. Sometimes, it can be a starter, other times it will be a nightstand MVP. Certain birth control methods can mess with a girl’s hormones; if you know (see final tip) she’s into it but her body doesn’t seem to be, focus on her to let her warm up more, or buy a bottle of lube. Whether you’re cis or LGBTQ+, it can be useful and sexy.

Try to remember where you threw your clothes

Keep an eye on where things go. Clothing can get lost in the heat of the moment, but no one wants to pull a lone G-string from between the cushions of the couch.

Don’t feel ashamed about walking home

There is no such thing as a walk of shame. You are an adult, you can make your own decisions, and you can hook-up with anyone you want. You shouldn’t be ashamed of yourself because you wanted to have a good time with someone, and no one should make you feel that way. 

Its okay to be awkward and funny

Sometimes, things aren’t perfect and can be a little weird or uncomfortable, but being awkward is nothing new. The person you’re hooking up with obviously likes you and finds you attractive, so remember to enjoy yourself.

There’s nothing wrong with breaking the tension with a little humor either. I literally whispered in a guy’s ear “I have a fever that only cowbell can satisfy” in my best Christopher Walken voice, and he thought it was cute – he laughed really hard, and kept kissing me.


I’ll say it again for the people in the back, CONSENT IS SEXY. You don’t have to have a full on disclosure agreement with your partner, just make sure what you’re doing is what they want. Its a nice thing to do to simply ask “Is this okay with you?”and  to let them know, if it isn’t you’ll stop.

University of Pittsburgh