How not to look like a total dick during your CABS ride

Absolutely no man spreading allowed

As a commuter student I take the bus every day, and almost every day without fail there's someone acting like a total dick on the bus. In the nearly three years I've been a student at Ohio State I can say with total confidence that public transportation is like the ninth circle of hell.

It's not that hard to be a decent human being during your 15 minute commute. Allow me to introduce your new CABS etiquette guide.

Don't sit your book bag down in an empty seat

If I had a dollar for every time I saw someone do this I would be able to buy a round of drinks for everyone in Midway on thirsty Thursday. We're all tired, we all hate lugging around heavy books, and yes we would like to sit down too—especially when the bus is full.

Under no circumstances should you be man spreading, this one goes for you too ladies

I'm not a guy so I don't know how uncomfortable it is to have a pair of balls sticking to my leg, but I'd like to have a little leg room. I see girls and guys doing this. If no one else has any personal space then people shouldn't have to make an exception for you.

For the love of Urban Meyer, wait to get on the bus until everyone who needs off gets out

Also, if someone has to exit the bus to let people off but still needs to keep riding to get to their stop please let them get on before you trample them to get on first. They had to wait just like you did.

If people are waiting to get on the bus and there's plenty of room, move your ass as far back as possible

Standing on the bus isn't fun, I've nearly been catapulted across the aisle my fair share of times. I've also been sandwiched between people who clearly didn't put on deodorant. What's more annoying than that is having to wait for another bus because some people were too lazy to scoot back.

Quit pulling the stop cord

The bus driver isn't going to let you off until the next stop no matter how many times you pull it. Keep dreaming.

Hang up the phone before you get on the bus

Being forced to listen to someone else's personal phone call is really awkward, especially if that person is using speakerphone.

Don't sit in the middle of two seats unless you absolutely need to

I understand sometimes people have to bring projects or instruments on the bus that take up space, but if you can fit in one seat why is it necessary to take up two?

Leave the personal grooming at home

No one wants to be hit in the face by your hair while you attempt to braid it and no one wants to watch you floss either.

Please don't be a trash person. Maybe even print this out if it helps–I'm being serious.

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