Drinking game to survive being home for the holidays

Merry Christmas you filthy animals

‘Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house, each parent and grandparent asks, “Where is your spouse?” You think over your answer and consider with care, but still want to tell them to shove it way, way up there. How do you tell them there’s no one special sharing your bed, except for that one frat guy who you sometimes give head? So while mama and papa lie down for a nap, stow away to your room for a holiday nightcap.

Take a drink when…

– Your mom asks if you’ve been seeing anyone

– Someone asks about your post-grad plans

– Someone quotes Elf un-ironically

– A relative tells you “any person would be lucky to date someone so handsome/beautiful”

– You hear a cover version of ‘Last Christmas’

– Every time a relative forgets your name/age/major and asks about it

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Take a shot when…

– Someone pulls out baby photos in front of your significant other to reminisce

– Someone says they hate Love Actually 

– You arrive at a family holiday party

– Take two shots if you arrive late

– Someone tries to hit the high note in ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You’ and fails

– Your parents try and give you a curfew despite the fact you’re a goddamn college student and partial adult

Finish your drink when…

– Your hyper-religious relative reminds you church happens every week and not just on Christmas

– Someone actually hits the high note in ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You’

– Every time grandma squeezes “those chubby cheeks”

– You’re compared to your siblings

– Someone jokes about not having finished their Christmas shopping

Shotgun a beer when…

– A relative brings up your GPA

– Someone makes a comment about your gameday pictures where you’re surrounded by booze

– Another family member or friend gets engaged/posts a baby announcement

– Every time A Christmas Story comes on

– A family member doles out a backhanded compliment to you

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Blackout when…

– Your egotistical cousin brings up his worldly travels… again

– Any form of politics is brought up

– Someone mentions your ex and how well they’re doing

– You’re reminded that you’re about to graduate and have zero set plans for your future

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