Everyone you will meet at OSU

While in college, it is inevitable to run into the same types of people. You may or may not know these people personally, but let’s face it, they fit the type. Whether you are this person or are friends with this person, you can put a face to these people because you’ve ran into them.

The frat star

Places seen: The O Patio at beat the clock
This guy bleeds his fraternity and has no problem telling you how awesome it is. Seriously, when he’s drunk him and brothers will not shut up about it. Every instagram post must include either the back drop of the frat house or someone wearing their letters. However, some of these frat stars aren’t awful to be around, you just really have to look for them.

The oval people

Places seen: the Oval, typically in front of Thompson Library.
You know exactly who I’m talking about. These are the people who have signs and petitions and are getting in your face while your just trying to walk into the library or simply enjoy a nice day at Oval Beach. They come to our campus with pretty disturbing videos (anti-abortion videos, we’re all scarred for life thanks to that) and are yelling about whatever they’re passionate about. To be honest, more than 80% of the time, we could’t care less about what you’re trying to get us involved in.

The jersey chaser

Places seen: Midway
The jersey chaser is the girl who ALWAYS goes after the athletes. She tweets about them, is seen hanging all over them at the bar or crying because he’s with some other girl. She never stops talking about all of the ones who’s phone numbers she has and literally will only go for the athletes. Probably will end up a trophy wife. Practice makes perfect, right?

*none of the girls pictured above are actual “jersey chasers”*

The gym rat

Places seen: the RPAC, JO South or JO North
Every time you go to the gym, you see this person. You know who I’m talking about, the one in their bodybuilding brand shirts, shaker bottles with pre workout or protein and are working out alone. This person isn’t that bad but you know they live and die by the gym because sometimes you have a class with them and they’re getting their pre workout ready during the end of class. The good news is you can always count on this person to be at the gym and they may even double as a nice view.

The high school all-star

Places seen: anywhere, sporting high school gear
Not to hate on high school gear because those shirts make nice cutoffs, but this person typically only wears that. They always talk about the “glory days” of their high school sports. This tends to be more guys than girls. Even at the bar this person will somehow work his stats from high school into conversation or say how his school once played Lebron’s school in basketball and how he showed up for the game. Time to close the yearbook, buddy.

The GDI

Places seen: NOT on 15th
Nothing against Greek life, but some people just really hate it and will preach how much they hate it any chance they get. They have a close friend group of fellow god damn independents who throw house parties you can always count on going to when there’s a formal and all the frats are dead. Plot twist: when this person ends up at a date party and says they only went for the free drinks. Fair enough.

The intramural baller

Places seen: the RPAC or the ARC
This person LOVES their intramural team and really wants to win their league championships mainly for their pride and to get the t-shirt. This person is fun to be around but DO NOT by any means bring up intramural unless you want to sit and listen for the next half hour of your life, especially if someone else from their team is there.

The guy at the bar

Places seen: Bullwinkles
Ladies, you know exactly who I’m talking about. This is the guy who’s standing a little too close either at the bar or out on the dance floor. He’s especially annoying where you’re clearly out with your girls and he’s trying to make moves. Sure, it’s nice to offer to buy a drink but don’t expect anything else man. He’s super creepy and when he asks for your number you give him one of your guy friends numbers just so he can get pissed off. Side note: if your guy friend is really awesome he’ll really mess with this guy (I know first hand).

The girl at the bar

Places seen: Bullwinkles bathroom
This girl is the one who needed to go home about an hour or so ago. She’s falling all over herself, spilling her drink and hugging everyone who walks in. She’s told 4 people “you’re just so pretty” alone in the 3 minutes you’ve been in the bathroom. That, or she’s in there calling some poor guy and telling him she loves him to come find her. It gets better, baby girl.

The dorm crush

Places seen: everywhere you don’t want to see them
We all had that one person on our floor freshman year who we loved seeing no matter what. Maybe you even hooked up a few times, but once summer came it just didn’t last and now any time you see them it’s awkward as hell. You never know what to say to this person but always see them at the worst time or place possible. Guess those memories on the twin bed weren’t gonna last forever.