Here’s what your go-to Bobst floor says about your study habits

Are you actually working or just binging Game of Thrones?

I remember my freshman self, searching everywhere in Bobst Library for a seat and a functioning outlet to get my “big girl” work done. I even remember keeping my head down, embarrassed to make eye contact with the upperclassmen-I thought to myself, can they tell I’m directionally challenged? Can they tell I’m trying to act like I meant to walk into that wall?

Images of Mean Girls flashed in my head and I couldn’t help but think the desk situation at Bobst was basically the jungle of cafeteria tables. Sure enough, I went straight to the back, plopped my books down, and made multiple laps in the same circle searching for a restroom. So to save everyone time this fall, here’s a guide to what your choice of floor in Bobst says about you (you’re welcome, freshman).

LL2: You’re really just here to fake study and watch GOT.

If you’ve just broken up with your boyfriend/girlfriend, LL2 is the perfect place to hide out. You’ll have no phone service and your chances of bumping into him/her, or anyone for that matter, well, simply don’t exist. You can even rent your very own study room – it’s your mini getaway. Alex Schayes, an NYU senior, said, “I like studying on LL2 because of the private study rooms.”

LL1: You’ve found the perfect setting for your Freshman 15.

You might spend more campus cash at the vending machines on LL1 that charge $4.00 for a Red Bull than you do printing money a couple feet away. Other than for your chocolate fix, it’s quite a boring place to be. Senior, Seth Kislin, said, “You won’t hear any noise here that you don’t want to.”

1: Just your ordinary drive-through printing station.

Floor one is where you would’ve found me four years ago. Your chances of finding a seat are minimal, and your chances of a functioning outlet are even fewer. However, great place to spend all your printing money and avoid the 5 South lines. Sophomore, Talia Ciklik, says, “Floor 1 is literally social happy hour.”

2/3: IDK?

Is two even a floor? ‘Nuff said. I tried collecting data for two, but the floor was empty and almost everyone I asked in Bobst, asked me if that’s even a floor, so there’s that.

I’m not even sure three is a floor.

4: Good work – you’re putting that hefty tuition to use.

Floor four is where you go when you actually have work to get done; not when you’re pretending you’re reading a PDF off your phone but really using the dog filter on snapchat. PSA: we see your eyebrows shrugging and tongue sticking out. It’s truly a hidden gem – quiet and newly renovated with chairs that don’t make your butt go numb, yet close enough to the stairs to get a bi-hourly dose of the fifth floor. Senior, Aya Abitbul, said “I like 4 because the North room is the only one with wheelie chairs!” Go to 4 North if you want a quiet enough spot to hear people’s breathing. PSA: do not bring a bag of chips with 70% air and 30% chips because you will get that look while opening it.

5: Who needs “Meet the Greeks” when you have the fifth floor?

The fifth floor is known as the “Greek Life” floor. Come to the fifth floor to see people watching netflix as an excuse to feel productive, chat with your friends, get no work done, and to flirt with the cute guy in his formal T-shirt. Rising junior, Paulina Sideris, said her favorite section of 5 is 5 west “because I like to flirt.” Come to 5W for social Greeks, 5E for harder working Greeks, and 5S because you don’t have enough time between classes to go home but too much time to look like a loner in the park. Jenny Chen, a rising junior said “I met my boyfriend by accidentally hitting him in the back of the head with a grape in 5 South!”

6: Did someone call a doctor?

Six is the place to be if you’re trying to have some deeper conversation about what happened on last night’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy, aside from *SPOILER ALERT* all your favorite characters dying off the show. In other words, if you’re looking for the doctor your mother always wanted you to marry, pitch a tent and hike out here. “I know 6 is the go-to floor when I have to cram for a test and need peace and quiet. It’s filled with pre-med students that are driven and focused and I love that,” said Karolina Katsnelson, Senior.

7: Queen B did say, let me upgrade you.

Some say orange is the new black, Dana Fink, a senior, says “But 7 is kinda the new 5.” That’s right. Come to seven for large crowded tables that make you feel like you’re in a news board meeting, but the clean bathrooms [you’d be surprised that college students don’t know how to flush, or aim toilet paper into the toilet bowl] make the uncomfortable shoulder touches well worth it. And on the bright side, you’re close enough to read the person next to you texting his/her parents about how hard he/she is working when in reality they’re on tinder. I see you swiping right.

8: Race with the clock to get your assignment done before your battery dies.

You know those horror movies where someone is climbing up the stairs, hoping for no creaks so the murderer doesn’t hear him/her? The desks on the eighth floor are the equivalent. Oh, and unless your computer has 100% battery power, good luck finding an outlet. I guess this is a fine place to be when you’re desperate, but your study grind is over the moment your computer battery dies. Well spent tuition, am I right? “I can literally hear the sound of squeaking chairs through my headphones,” Senior, Sydney Grant, said.

9: Need a last minute summer tan? 

I’m pretty sure the saying “it’s always sunny in Philadelphia” was inspired by the ninth floor. The ninth floor is so sunny that you can’t take off your sunglasses for six hours straight, making the glare that much stronger on your computer screen; so much so you can’t see Netflix asking if you want to continue watching. I’m pretty sure I sweat out the finals chipotle I got myself on this floor. “I come here when I have to study but have FOMO from the plethora of students enjoying the sun in the park. So, I get to tan and study at the same time up here. I recommend bringing sunscreen and not wearing your black lulus,” graduate Victoria VanWie said. Unfortunately, much of this floor is under construction.

10: If Bobst was a Drake album, this floor would be ~views~.

If the tenth floor had a JSwipe profile, its only redeemable quality would be its views. This is kind of one of those last resort floors. If it’s finals season and you don’t trust yourself in the confines of Starbucks or your bedroom, it’s worth the schlep up. Honestly, couldn’t find anyone here to tell me why they would voluntarily skip floors 1-9.

11/12: Dead end.

If you’re trying to kiss the door the way you do at Josie’s Pub, make your way to floors 11 and 12 to be stopped by NYU security. Unless you’re an administrator, dean of libraries, or President Hamilton, go back down.

So, there you have it. Freshmen, welcome to Bobst and may the studying odds be ever in your favor. Oh, and one last thing, don’t be that guy who holds up the herd of students while you’re balancing your ByChloe salad, Think coffee, umbrella, trying to find your ID to swipe in. Get your life together, please.