Why deferring enrollment was the best decision I’ve made

One time in school, my teacher asked us to draw what we pictured ourselves as in the next 10 years. Everyone around me began drawing themselves at the UN, at some fancy office wearing a business suit, as a doctor…but I drew myself with a big smile. When it was time to explain our plans, I said I imagined myself happy. A classmate joked, “Meaning you’ll be a housewife.” Everyone laughed. But I sat there trying to understand what was so absurd about me simply wanting to be happy.

When I first got my diploma and my NYU acceptance letter I was overjoyed. The next 10 years suddenly flashed before my eyes with clarity: I would go to college, graduate, do summer jobs before getting a “real” job, and then I would get married, have children, and be happy forever.

But maybe one day I would wake up and realize I did all that only because it was expected of me. Everyone else is finishing school and going to college, so that’s what I should do too, right? Why is that when I said I imagined myself happy, I was the subject of jokes and judgements?

Here is the ugly truth: When you’re 18 years old, you have a piece of paper telling you you’ve finished high school, but you have no idea where life is taking you. Most of us are just going with the flow and doing what is expected of us. That is a mistake. We must figure out what we love, we must give ourselves time to grow, to have new experiences, to try out new things. This is our time: We worked hard to get to the end of high school, so we owe it to ourselves to explore.

So when circumstances at home led me to defer college for a year, I grasped it as an opportunity to do everything I wanted to do but couldn’t.

Give your brain a breather

Deadlines, essays, college application, SAT prep, Algebra test. Fail. Pass. You are not good enough. C-. This was what high school life was like, and now you’re going to college only to restart all this madness. You deserve a break. Give yourself the chance to breathe and detox your body from this stress.

Get healthy

A gap year could also be an opportunity to focus on your body and become healthier. I took pilates, dance classes, meditation and cycling, which were all therapeutic and helped me become much more motivated and spirited. My mind slowly became clearer, more active,  and ready to face new challenges with clarity and openness.

Find your passion

You know that passion of yours, that maybe you don’t want to major in but is something that makes you fulfilled? Explore it during a gap year. My passion has always been performing arts, so I took this year to explore it entirely. I took singing lessons, sang in bands, took theatre, musical theatre, interpretation on screen and even dance  classes such as jazz and tap. I laid down at the end of the day with an exhilaration and sense of fulfillment that can only come when you give submerge yourself in things that make you happiest.

Gain real-world experience

During my year off, I got a job as an English and Portuguese teacher at a language school called Berlitz, where I could make money and learn simultaneously. I also aided the Syrian refugees in my country, bringing them food and making Christmas events for the children. Through these two experiences, I gained a perspective on other cultures that most people don’t have when they’re fresh out of high school.

Meet new people

With whatever new things you decide to try during a year off, you’re bound to meet new, interesting people. Expanding your social and professional networks will definitely help you in the long run.

So when you’re going off to college, think to yourself: Am I happy? Is this what I want? If you feel uneasy, you can take a gap year and explore all that the world has to offer before committing yourself to years of academia. At the end of the day you will have grown as a person, making you more prepared for college than ever.