Every moment of stress you experienced this holiday season
‘Grandma, I still do not have a boyfriend’
Thanksgiving has passed, you’ve been stressed, you’ve been chilled – emotions are simply running high. You were asking yourself a million questions: Which side of the family do I spend thanksgiving with? What do I offer to bring? Do I sit at the kids or adult table? Do I follow through with my oddly in-depth plan to fake your death?
Family at Thanksgiving: How's college going?
Me: It's going great!
— Common White Girl (@CommonWhiteGrl) November 22, 2016
The whole thing makes for some level of discomfort, but here’s every single moment of stress you experienced last week.
Undesirable topics of discussion
— CNN (@CNN) November 22, 2016
In case anybody was not aware, the United States just elected a new president. If you wanted the holiday to remain remotely peaceful, you avoided this discussion topic at all costs. Any intelligent family member would refer to a list that of useless facts and yell one as loud as you can as soon as politics was brought up.
The fear that you would eat way too much
Me: I should probably pace myself with thanksgiving food, don't wanna eat too much
Inner Me: Food Coma. Go. pic.twitter.com/0JvuGe9SYD
— Princess Chandi (@Chandler_Fulks) November 25, 2016
You did it. Accept it now.
The crippling realization that you ate your bodyweight in turkey and potatoes
There is not a lot to do in this situation besides wait it out. I recommend going on a run to mask the guilt at least.
Your Grandma asked if you have a significant other – yet
You now know to go on a rant about finding yourself until she is satisfied. If you have the talent and dedication, you could have made up a fake boyfriend that there is no evidence of existing.
I apologize profoundly if you had to travel near the holiday.
Long car rides with family can be difficult and so can airport lines and flight delays. More snacks are the only key.
Being stuck in the house you grew up in
What’s worse? You just have to get a hobby that will get you out of the house: running, photography or anything that involves a semi-nomadic theme.
If 20+ years has taught you anything, it’s that you need to focus on the things you and your siblings have in common and stick with that. You know not to play a board game – they’re a recipe for disaster yet a trap we all find ourselves in during the holidays.
None of your favorite cousins can even ease the pain due to different plans
— The Onion (@TheOnion) November 22, 2016