What it’s really like to live with your boyfriend in college

I met my boyfriend back in 2009 at a District Jazz Band competition – we hit it off immediately and started dating a few weeks later. We broke up for a brief period, but it’s been a grand total of almost seven years. Living with your significant other can be the best thing in the world, if you’re ready, but it can also be the worst, if you’re not. However, there should be a few things you should be prepared for as well as some exciting things to look forward to.

Our first date, back in 2009

Everybody poops

Luckily, the apartment we share has two separate bathrooms, but if you aren’t past the farting-in-front-of-each-other stage in your relationship, be prepared. It will eventually happen and that’s totally okay. Everybody farts and poops. If you’re planning to share a room with someone, remember: people fart when they’re asleep. It’s a thing. You do, too. And if you’re a girl who’s not used to living with boys, they make a lot of poop and fart jokes – you get used to it.

You will be forced to try new things a lot

This is true of living with any new person, but especially a significant other. When you’re close enough that you live together, you want to share your interests. I *now* like kale, broccoli and the hilarious musical stylings of Stephen Lynch. He can now longboard, talk about books he’s never read like he’s studied them, and cook gluten-free food. However, I still don’t like tofu, most video games or pepperoni and he still doesn’t like Gilmore Girls, wine or coloring.

You have a built-in outfit advisor

There are very few days that I don’t ask my boyfriend’s opinion on my hair, outfit or make-up. I even force him to go shopping with me now, because he knows my style better than I do. He probably complains about this phenomena as much as I praise it, however, I know he secretly loves that I value his opinion so much. However, take heed: if your boyfriend is the type to always tell you look good to appease you, you’ll soon realize full denim outfits aren’t a thing. My boyfriend will be honest with me and tell me if something doesn’t look good.

Be prepared for “I” stuff to become “we” stuff

When you’re single, most everything you do is “I” unless it’s with friends, but even then it’s, “I’ll meet you at [whatever time].” When you’re in a couple, the “I” slowly starts to fade from your vocabulary and morph into “we:” “We’ll meet you at [whatever time]” “Oh, we’re busy today; sorry.” However, when you move in with your boyfriend, this vocabulary fade-out happens more suddenly -especially if, like us, you ride together most places. Suddenly, you’re saying sentences like, “Oh, sorry, we have to grocery shop because we’re out of shampoo and trash bags” and you wonder where the hell that came from, it’s not like you share the shampoo. Before you know it, you and your boyfriend have morphed into one single entity, the “we.”

It’s important to still have alone time

As we all know, we date people and get involved in relationships because we like spending time with that person. This certainly doesn’t change when you move in with the person you love. However, you can’t sacrifice all your alone time for couple time – it’s unhealthy. Whether it’s an hour-long bath or a lunch date with a friend without your significant other, be sure to schedule some me-time.

Sometimes things get a little too honest, too fast

As stated before, living with your significant other can be fantastic, if you’re ready. If you’re in a new, budding relationship, I wouldn’t advise taking this big step just yet and here’s why: moving in with someone is like hitting the relationship fast-forward button. If you’re lucky, it’ll just make you love the person even more, but if you’re unlucky, it can prove to be the ultimate test of your relationship. Any little behavior that you found annoying before, gets magnified tenfold when you can’t avoid it. Furthermore, behaviors and habits you didn’t notice or didn’t know about before are magnified, as well. Sometimes you hear things you didn’t want to hear and learn things you didn’t want to know. Just be prepared to be confronted with the best and worst about your partner and hopefully, it will just make you stronger as a couple.

The argument-starting toilet seat

It shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone that boys lift the toilet seat up when they pee. However, the issue of who exactly is responsible for putting it back down can become a hot-button issue. The two arguments I see most are: the guy put it up, he can put it back down and the girl should look before she sits. The only way to avoid this fight is to be an understanding person. We’re all human – we all forget things. It’s just a toilet seat, there are bigger world issues to be concerned with.

Be prepared to listen to conversations you may not care about

It should also come as no surprise that not everyone shares 100% of their interests with their significant other. It’s ok – if the world was full of people with all the same interests it’d be beyond boring and can you imagine the length of the lines to get into places? However, I’m sure your partner has sat through their fair share of conversations they have no opinions on – be courteous.

Be prepared to talk a lot more

One thing I’ve noticed about living with my boyfriend is that we talk a lot more frequently than before. This is for a number of reasons: we see each other more, we’re more fond of each other, etc. However, some of this “talk” has to do with feelings and our relationship. It makes sense though, you’re mixing two different routines and two different walks of life together under one roof – things can get messy and heated. The key to not letting this cause your relationship to implode is communication.  Communication will not only bring you closer, but will also make your relationship stronger, so get to talking!