Finals Week as told by The Grinch
Finals week can be the definition of an emotional rollercoaster, but luckily The Grinch is always there for you to relate to
Sadly, the time has come for you to compile all of your notes from the semester and binge study in order to save your GPA. You made it out of midterms alive, but finals are a whole new ball game. Thankfully, this means that winter break and Christmas are just around the corner, but not before one hell of a battle.
No one likes a Grinch, but finals week will make you realize that you might relate to this green, termite-infested Christmas-hater more than you would like to admit.
It's the last week of classes and your professors are laying down the law…along with more work than you thought was legal
The time has come to check how many finals you need to drag yourself through the next week and you find yourself wondering if any of your professors realize that you take more than one class.
You find out that you have less than a week to turn in 3 projects, 4 papers and 6 finals. How can one human do all of this and still find time to eat and sleep?
You start to miss the high school days, when you could wait until the night before to even look at the study guide and still get an A
You graduated with a 3.5 GPA, and hardly ever had to do any preparation on your own. Why did the Jeopardy and Kahoot review sessions that saturated the three days before any exam disappear after you got your diploma?
You never thought this day would come, but you definitely miss how easy you had it in high school.
You find yourself bombarded with demands to finish your course evaluations before you've even opened ICON
Professor John Doe has sent you 6 emails requesting that you finish your evaluation of his class. You try your hardest to respond with positive feedback and hold back how you really feel about his attendence policy and all of the unnecessary discussion posts.
You know he's only doing his job, but your mom always told you to never tell a lie. Sorry, but not sorry.
Every coffee shop you walk into is so overly festive, that you have to grab your latte and make a run for it
How are you supposed to enjoy Christmas music when you're slowly dying inside?
As much as you are looking forward to having a holly jolly Christmas, you have an overwhelming desire to turn the clock back to August and pay more attention during lecture. To top it off, you definitely don't feel joyful OR triumphant.
You start looking for any possible excuse to avoid getting started
Leaving your house to walk through the tundra and down to the Main Library feels more like climbing Mount Everest. You know that you should be spending the weekend before your exams studying, but you watch enough Barstool videos to know that Saturdays are DEFINITELY not for making flashcards.
When you finally build up the courage to get started on a paper, but can't even remember how to sound like you're smarter than a 5th grader
Remember that Spongebob episode where he's writing an essay for boating school, but ends up spending the entire time perfecting the word "The"? This is you. This is your life now. You are Spongebob.
You can't remember a single thing from your American History class to even start one sentence of your final paper. This shouldn't be so hard, you live in America for Christ's sake!
To top it off, you probably forgot how to write a thesis too. Awesome. Your brain is officially dead and the frustration is way too real.
You notice that there's a box addressed to you on the front porch and realize your Mom sent you a care package
You have so many snacks that you could feed an army, and you're loaded up with enough hot cocoa to get you through an Ice Age. What did you do to deserve such a great Mom?
You're still jealous that she's probably sitting at home binge watching Dr. Phil while you slave away, but at least you have a little motherly love to get you through the week from hell.
Hygiene and style have officially gone out the window until Friday
It's your 2nd all-nighter at the library in the past 3 days, and you just realized you haven't showered yet. How did you let yourself get to this point? Whatever, you don't even have time to get close enough to anyone for them to smell you anyways.
Rock that mismatched, comfy outfit and don't you dare remove that hairtie from your mess of a bun until Christmas.
When you check Quizlet and find a study set for your class–but it's the WRONG CHAPTER
How can the world be so cruel? All you want is a little guidance, or at least a starting point, but apparently everyone else in your class is just as lost as you are.
This is when you start to regret hiding in the back during every lecture and not searching around for potential study buddies.
You're finally in the zone, and you quickly realize that you forgot to feed yourself
You haven't had an appetite since last Thursday, and you're starting to regret all the caffeine and stimulants you have consumed. You know you need to put something in your stomach, but nothing sounds appealing.
You finally settle on a bag of pretzels from the cafe in the Main Library and spend an hour mindlessly eating while you study just so you don't pass out.
Your friends call you and say that they scored a great table at the Lib, but you can't decide if you can handle the distractions that they bring or not
The best thing about finals week is that you aren't alone. Everyone you know is in the same boat and shares your stress level. Plus, you have thousands of shoulders to cry on in any campus building or coffee shop…if you're brave enough to bombard a stranger with your feelings.
Studying with your friends can be the best or worst thing for you. It's nice to have someone to talk to during the breaks you take from staring at your computer screen, but it can be hard to stay focused when all you want to do is ask Sarah about the date she went on last weekend.
It's the night before your last exam, and you decide to skip the all-nighter you were prepared for to finally get some real sleep
You're snuggled up in your warm bed, surrounded by a messy room that you haven't had time to tend to. You know that your roommates are done for the semester, and that they're planning on heading downtown to celebrate.
You find yourself holding back from making serious threats in the group chat about what would happen if they wake you up when they drunkenly stumble home at 2 a.m.
It's the morning of your last final and you realize that you still have three more chapters to memorize
You start to regret skipping that all-nighter to sleep, because you feel more unprepared than you did at the beginning of the week.
You're still exhausted, and you start to wonder if your bed can even do you good anymore. There are only 6 hours left until you take your hardest exam, so you don't even have time to daydream about all the free-time that's around the corner.
You walk into your last final, and see your professor handing out thick packets like they're death sentences
Does he realize how much chaos he has caused by making the exam all short answer and essay questions? Come on, throw a dog a bone and toss in at least a handful of multiple choice to give us some options to pick from.
Don't forget to pack your mistletoe and Grinch-like bravery, because this might be the last chance you have to show your professor how you REALLY feel about three to five paragraph answers.
YOU'RE FINALLY DONE–is this real life??
All the weight on your shoulders has disappeared, and now you just have to wait to see the damage: your grades.
You've officially crossed the finish line and now it's time to celebrate and look forward to the holidays. All you want to do is shout "I'M FREE, I'M FINALLY FREE!!" from the rooftops.
Well…until next semester that is.