I’m glad I dropped out of my sorority when I did
I will forever hold a special spot in my heart for these girls, but it was just not for me
I went through recruitment my freshman year, a grueling process of repetition and learning how to ward off sexual harassment.
Bid day was a blur of excitement. We ran outside and found a big group of girls screaming our name and waving our names on sticks.
The sorority had set up the house to look like a carnival, with decorations, and most importantly FOOD.
But already the drama had started. I remember one of the first things I could hear when we all got outside and were in a big group was “Oh _____ made it into here. I was really hoping she wouldn’t.”
This disappointed me because we were joining a sisterhood, and we were all supposed to look out for and care for each other. There were roughly 150 (64 in our pledge class) of us who were newly sisters and we should all be happy that we made it this far.
At first, I thought this would be over with after they got their first few snide comments out, but it continued all the way to the photo above when some girls didn’t even want to stand on the same side of the girls who they did not like.
I knew that not liking each other was bound to happen because there was so many of us – 64 new girls pledged – the most out of any sorority.
After all the work of recruitment was done we finally could have the fun we were working towards. Or so we thought.
Two days after bid day we had a 100 percent mandatory three hour meeting that no one really would tell us what about. I remember thinking that I really hoped it wouldn’t be yet another “don’t rape each other” speech, and low and behold it was.
At the same time I was proud that Greek life was taking such a strong stance against rape. Really the whole time I have been here on campus I have learned anti-sexual assault things 4-1 through Greek life over just the University trying to teach us things.
After that we had some fun. We had our first social the first Thursday after that. The social was pretty stereotypical.
We dressed up in Hawaiian-themed clothes and started the night at Spoco, then went to the “secret” after parties that aren’t really secret and everyone knows about.
The night was a lot of fun, and I got to know a lot more of my sisters in a way I hadn’t know them before.
This was the night that I really started to bond with Sam Kloft, who would later become my big.
Yet once I became better friends with the women who had been in the chapter for a long time, I started to learn how corrupted all the hierarchy of all sororities are.
A lot goes on behind the scenes that people who are not in Greek life don’t see, even things that people who are IN Greek life don’t see.
One of my friends in my chapter was stripped of her title in the sorority, and when she asked for the reasoning to her dismissal they told her one thing. When everyone else in the sorority was told that she would no longer be doing what she was doing, they told us something 150 percent different, making it look as though it was her choice to no longer do something she had worked so hard on.
The whole system was so skewed to the side of who ever was in charge – anyone who went slightly against whatever viewpoints they may have would be instantly ostracized.
At the same time, you could feel the sisterhood in the friends you had made within the chapter. I don’t know how my year would have been if I hadn’t met some of these girls and I am forever grateful for that.
But I am also grateful that I got out when I did. When I dropped my sorority it was about a week after I had actually gotten initiated.
Everyone always asks me why I dropped, and to be honest the reason was nothing. We were doing nothing, and nothing was even trying to be planned. The sorority couldn’t do any socials anymore because the insurance that they had made it so we could only have socials at SpoCo, which we could only rent out for the first half of the semester, making it so we could only have three socials.
I was also super against the dress code. They would call out girls who were in outfits that I would wear to an interview just because they were wearing Hunter boots – it was snowing. Then the girl next to her could be wearing the most miss-matched, unprofessional outfit in the world but because it matched everything on the dress code it was fine. Plus, they said you couldn’t wear Sperry’s, BECAUSE THEY WEREN’T FANCY ENOUGH. I mean really?
But in the end I was tired of all the drama, and having to spend all the money.
I dropped early morning on the first of December, and didn’t receive any response to my dropping till a few days later. At that time they told me and my family that I would have to pay for the month of December even though I would not be a sister during that month.
The billing was really confusing the whole time I was in the chapter because they never told us where the money was going towards, which would have been nice seeing we were paying almost $300 a month.
After fighting back and forth for most of the month and being threatened that my family would be taken to collection court, my mom finally got nationals involved and I was finally released from my chapter without having to pay for the month of December.
The nice thing about this was even though the local chapter did not want to do this, nationals was very helpful and un-initiated me in case I wanted to join another house. They gave me back my initiation fee money of $195.
Now that I am a GDI, I am glad that I have great friends both in and out of the Greek system.
Greek life taught me to not be scared to ask your sisters for help, but being a god damn independent taught me to also be myself and to venture out. I got the best of both worlds.