The key player in same-sex marriage came to IU last week

‘I couldn’t give up the fight against the system that seemed rigged against us’

Jim Obergefell, the key plaintiff in the 2015 U.S. Supreme Court case Obergefell v. Hodges that ultimately led to the legalization of same-sex marriage across the nation, visited Bloomington last Tuesday and Wednesday.

We attended his lecture Wednesday evening in Alumni Hall where he gave a 30 minute speech on his experiences with American legislature and on the importance of LGBT activism.

The US Constitution Preamble opener “We the People” was the focal point of Obergefell’s speech. He used it to explain why he decided to pursue justice at the federal level and to outline his ultimate goal, which is to live in a country that provides equal rights for all people.

Shortly after coming out to his family in 1992, Obergefell met John, the man that would one day become his husband. The two lived together as a couple in Cincinnati for several years, but unfortunately were unable to get married due to restrictive city and state legislation.

In 2011, John’s health took a negative turn. After months of tests, he was diagnosed with ALS. Obergefell and John decided to find a way to get to Maryland, where same sex marriage was legal following the Supreme Court’s 2013 overturning of the Defense of Marriage Act. With John’s aunt as the ordained minister, they traveled by charter medical jet and finally exchanged vows on the tarmac of a Maryland airport.

Just days after the ceremony,Obergefell and John filed a lawsuit against the state of Ohio demanding that a restraining order requiring the state to accurately document John’s relationship status on his death certificate be set in place. The court ruled in their favor, and John passed away exactly three months after the ruling was made with Obergefell documented as John’s legal husband.

After John’s death, Obergefell decided to continue on in his legal battle.

He said: “I could’ve decided to take a step back, to go back to my quiet life, to give up the fight against the system that seemed rigged against us. But I couldn’t do it. I’d promised John to love, honor, and protect him, and I had to do everything I could do to live up to those promises. I owed it to John, and I owed it to all those couples like us across the country.

“I owed it to the parents who want their children to grow up in a world where marrying the love of their life, regardless of who that is, is a possibility. And it was simply the right thing to do.”

In January 2015, John and 30 other plaintiffs had their cases accepted by the Supreme Court under the title Obergefell v. Hodges, were heard by the Supreme Court in April, and, on June 26, 2015, received the ruling that they had won, and that same sex marriage was now legal in all fifty states.

In the remainder of the speech, Obergefell stressed that, although this win for the LGBT+ community was enormous, there is still a great deal of work to be done. He discussed the importance of fighting for the rights of those in the transgender community and continuing to push back against religious discrimination against the LGBT+ community.

He also urged participation in the upcoming presidential election. Many leading Republican candidates have pledged to do everything in their power to reverse the LGBT+ legislation that has been passed. Obergefell said it is vital that, in order to preserve the progress that has been made and to be able to continue making progress, supporters of the LGBT+ community must vote for a candidate who will uphold LGBT+ rights.

Obergefell received a standing ovation from the audience at the end of his speech. A brief Q&A followed, for which he answered a variety of questions in his thoughtful, soft-spoken manner. He shared more about the man John was, and detailed the absolute joy he and the rest of the LGBT+ community felt on the day of the Supreme Court ruling and in the days that followed.

In several of his responses to questions, he emphasized the importance of educating people on the LGBT+ community and sharing stories and personal experiences with one another as a way of changing hearts and minds through small-scale interactions. He discussed how, as an accidental-activist-turned-purposeful-activist, he is now working with others toward combating LGBT+ homelessness, advocating for transgender rights and passing the Equality Act (an updated version of the 1964 Civil Rights Act that will provide protection against discrimination based on sexual orientation, gender identity, and sex as well as race). He told the audience to recognize that many people are still coming to terms with certain concepts in the realm of sexuality and gender identity, and that everyone ought to give others “a little bit of leeway” as their education increases.

It was an honor to hear Obergefell share his story and speak so bravely on behalf of the LGBT+ community. It was incredible to see the diversity of the crowd to which he spoke. People from across a wide spectrum of age, race, sexuality and gender were represented there and all seemed to be in equal awe of Obergefell’s touching story and his works of activism.

“We the People” of Indiana University, regardless of our individual differences, ought to keep Jim Obergefell’s messages in mind as we go about our own lives.

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