Everyone you’ll meet in your first month at Georgetown

It’s over, NSO is done, and you’re finally a college student. The next few months are full of spending a fortune on books you’ll never read, going out on nights you’ll never remember, and finally meeting people with names you’ll never learn.

You’ll meet a lot of people in your first month as a Hoya, here’s a list of everyone you’ll meet:

Your Roommate

This one goes one of two ways. You might only acknowledge this person only when necessary despite the fact you sleep a few feet away from them. If you’re lucky like I was, your roommate becomes your best friend and closest ally. This person eats most meals with you, grocery shops with you, keeps up with you on the weekends, and shares most experiences with you. I would take a bullet for my roommate. She may not be convinced because of the time I heard the fire alarm go off in the middle of the night and ran out without her. (Sorry.)

Your RA

Like your roommate, this person is a toss-up. Either this person will be painfully strict, and you hear them knocking any time you listen to music without headphones in. If you’re lucky like I was, you’ll have a great RA who can lay down the law but also be a fun person to hang out with and get to know.

The love of your life

The hot person that sits next to you on the very first day of Intro to Macroeconomics, and gets your demand curves growing exponentially. There are two hundred seats in the ICC Auditorium and they chose YOU. Class hasn’t even started, and you’re planning your wedding under the Northern Lights in a rural Norwegian town. You’ve never spoken, but you know they’re the one. You will obsess about this person until you find out they have a significant other/you find a real significant other/they switch seats in Macro/you are no longer taking Macro.

The Washington Insider

This is the person who is probably on a first name basis with multiple Congressmen. Their profile picture is them standing on the Speaker’s Balcony of the Capitol Building or standing next to an elected official. They have already designed the posters for their 2036 presidential run.

The diplomat’s son

This is the person who talks to men in suits sitting in black SUVs. This person is also probably an international student. You’ll find out who they are when you see their father’s name in the news during an international crisis.

The social eater

This person would rather starve than eat alone at Leo’s. Despite Grab and Go and the handy “Eating Alone?” signs, this person would rather go without than dare risk someone see them eating by themselves. This is normal and should go away pretty soon.

Confused boy in the laundry room

This is the guy who has wondered his entire life how the dirty clothes on his bedroom floor ended up clean and folded on his bed. To him, turning on the washing machine is like trying to solve a Rubix cube. He will be found on the phone with his mom the first three to four times he does laundry. (Hint if this is you: Pick a temperature and hit start—warm for sheets and towels and cold for regular clothes.)

Social justice warrior

This person is somehow an advocate for every single social justice cause you can imagine—including some you may never have heard of. This person will probably also write to Bernie Sanders in November, and bore you with their endless theories about how Bernie can still win (he can’t). Bonus points if they’re vegan. Retract points for when they inevitably holiday in the South of France.

The person “Making Up for Lost Time”

This person probably got GERMS’d during NSO or at least within the first few weekends of coming to Georgetown. This person never drank in high school and assumed they were the only ones who didn’t. This is false and should not be a reason to go insane at a party, especially when you have no idea what your alcohol tolerance is. Getting GERMS’d is not a graduation requirement.

The MSBro

This person is in the McDonough School of Business and talks like they’re on the Board for Goldman Sachs. Don’t be surprised when their father actually is.

The GOCard-less

This person somehow has left their GOCard everywhere on campus. You’ll find them locked out of their dorm building, praying someone is coming soon who can let them in. Do not let this be you, especially if it’s raining outside.

Pro Tip: If you do lose your GOCard, the GOCard office in Darnall Hall (next to Epi and the Student Health Center) will happily replace it for you for $25.

The husband and wife

These people have been dating since before they got to Georgetown. It is rare to spot one of them without the other, and they will make you feel hopelessly single. They cook, wash, laugh, cry, eat, sleep, study, exercise, party, and do laundry together. They’re probably intolerable.

Attended but asleep

Attendance is a major factor in your final grade, and this person understands that. It’s understandably difficult to stay awake after the first forty-five minutes of a lecture in ICC Auditorium. They tried.

The party animal

This person comes home sloppy drunk on Tuesday nights, and you can’t imagine where they could have gone, but they smell like a cheap bar.

Undecided but probably government

This about 80% of the freshmen in the College. The liberal arts education was designed for them.

 

Your first week BFF

This is the one person in your OA group whose name you remember that let’s you sit with
them at Leo’s. Once you both find other friends, you may never speak to this person ever again, but they will be who you cling on to for your dear life in the first weeks.

Your real best friends

At Convocation, you probably heard a Georgetown faculty member say that the friends you meet here will dance at your wedding. These people make you believe that. They will be you life for the next four years, your laughter, your fall-outs, and your teary make-ups. They will comfort you when the love of your life starts dating that girl from Macro.