Halloween costumes: Expectations vs. reality

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Halloween costumes: Expectations vs. reality

You’ll end up holding back your roommate’s glitter-covered hair as she pukes in the upstairs bathroom

You and your friends have been thinking about this day (or week for most colleges) since the beginning of the school year: Halloween. Your group chat is flooded with brainstorms of potential cute group costumes that are flattering for every squad member, and not too try hard. Weeks leading up, the preparation begins, and… Yeah, there is no preparation, you guys forget to go to Target and end up squeezing into last year’s costume that you thankfully packed for a themed party.

Makeup Expectation:

Your friend group plans on being jungle animals. Thankfully, your roommate went to cosmetology summer camp for two weeks in seventh grade so you all put your trust into her. One by one, the cheetah, zebra, tiger and jaguar looks are all perfected with the perfect amount of bronzer and you all end up with the perfect Instagram of your profile to show off your nonexistent double chins.

Makeup Reality:

The group plans on being animals, and since nobody actually knows how to do the makeup for it, you all rely on the always trustworthy YouTube. Each one of you end up looking like donkeys, so an Instagram worthy picture is not an option for tonight, but thank god parties are dark. You turn around later in the night to see your dance floor make out from a half an hour ago covered in black and white stripes down to his neck. Oops.

Dieting Expectation:

It is October 1st, which means the planning has begun, in every aspect. One friend picks out the typical devil and angel group costumes. “We all need to lose five pounds to even fit into that,” one friend shouts. You all look on Pinterest for month long diet options and settle on the grapefruit diet (duh). By the end of the month, you have all lost the five pounds, except Becky who has lost seven (that bitch), and end up looking amazing.

Dieting Reality:

It is a month before Halloween, and your friend group is surrounded by a single computer looking at potential costume ideas eating pizza. One friend points out how you should all probably start your diet to actually be able to fit into the costumes being picked out, but it’s Sunday, and everybody knows diets start on Monday… Monday rolls around and so does the scent of a burrito. You all forget about the diet, end up gaining about three pounds, and resort to wearing oversized neon shirts and being “skittles,” aka something to hide your stomach.  

Group Costumes Expectation:

Obviously you want to take a cute group shot, which means you have to pick out a clever and cute group costume, which takes a lot of planning. You all head online, find the best costume idea, and head to Target so you can make it homemade. This results in the perfect social media post and many kudos from your friends.

Group Costumes Reality:

You plan on being the seven dwarfs, which means a trip to Target. One friend says she will go to Target later in the week, which never ends up happening. You all end up splitting up by the end of the night. So you look like a single dwarf. Weird.

Drinking Expectation:

One friend decides to make a fruity cocktail, you all decide to take the group pictures before drinking begins, and put a limit on the shot intake. Each friend drinks the amount they are limited to, and everybody ends up in their own bed with no cuts or bruises.

Drinking Reality:

You and your friends all pinky promise that nobody will throw up, runaway or get arrested. The pregame starts off casual with some vodka gummy worms and a Halloween themed cocktail that you all plan to sip on. Three shots turns into six, you and your roommate decide to go shot for shot, and the last thing anyone can piece together is watching Becky leave the party with Batman. The next morning you receive the group text “Is everyone alive?” And as you are about to reply, you get a call. “Hey can you pick me up at John’s? I’m in Denver,” Becky trembles as she speaks. Well, I guess we found Becky.


Though college students all live for this day (or week), it never actually turns out as planned. Maybe the costume might not be perfect, and the makeup will definitely smear off, but there will definitely be no lack of interesting stories and pictures to laugh about the following weeks.

@TheTab