Top five things Cornell frat stars say at the door

There is a certain sense of dread that comes with walking up to the door of a frat house. Even if we have an ‘in’ with the kid from our statistics class, we never know what the pair of frat boys at the door are going to say when we show up to their party with our friends.

After listening to multiple experiences that my friends have had, there seem to be five go-to phrases that frat boys use when people are attempting to get into their parties…and, after you really think about it, they are all kind of ridiculous.

“Do you even go here?”

Ah yes, the classic first question, usually followed up by, “Show me your ID.” Are they purposely trying to sound like Damien from Mean Girls?

Unless you’re a frequent attendee of that particular frat house, you and your friends are bound to hear that question. But come on. We’re in Ithaca, New York. With Ithaca College all the way on the other side of town, why else would we be at your door at eleven o’clock at night if we didn’t go to Cornell?

“Who do you know?”

Sometimes this devolves into a rapid fire quiz session. “How do you know him? How close are you? What is the name of his favorite aunt?”

Okay, I sort of get it. I wouldn’t want strangers in my house either. But the last time I checked, the point of a party was to have fun, turn up, and live your life. In fact, one of the best parts of going out is the possibility of meeting and getting to know new people. How is that going to happen if you don’t let new people in?

“Chug this beer faster than me and you can come in.”

This usually happens if you and your friends don’t know anybody inside. For you, it’s a ticket into the party, but for the frat boys it’s a form of entertainment that they can put on SnapChat to look cool. Yeah, I don’t think so…

“We’re Capped”

This is basically their way of trying to be nice. They don’t want to straight up reject you, but they don’t want you to come in either.

The thing is, you can see through the window and the party’s not full at all. In fact, I see the party’s not that turnt either, so maybe it’s a good thing they didn’t let you and your friends in. You wouldn’t want to go to a wack party anyway.

“Leave”

Okay, so skip the past four comments, and just deal with the straight up rejection.

So, after hours of getting ready, pre-gaming, and taking cute before pictures and videos you can post on Facebook and SnapChat, someone slams the door in your face. What are you and your friends supposed to do now?

Walk to the next frat house and pray the same thing doesn’t happen.