Not just nerds: Every type of student at CMU explained
Which one are you?
CMU may be known as a school of computer science nerds, but we’ve got a whole subset of stereotypes on campus.
From cliched art students to the recognized geniuses, here’s a breakdown of the most prevalent stereotypes of CMU students. You know who you are.
Archies
Sketch buildings on campus with a dead look in their eyes. Always in studio. Always. Their pride will be how they can free hand draw a straight line, and they’ll try and flirt with you by telling you about CMU’s architectural properties. It won’t work.
Sleep in studio (photo: Nickie Cheung)
Computer science nerds
Enjoy the privileges of being CMU’s chosen child. Either coding, thinking about coding, or talking about coding. They’ll inexplicably be wearing hiking jackets and boots, despite having just rolled out of bed because they were up until 4am doing a hackathon with their friends.
They’ve all got a concept for an app that’s going to change the world, and they will definitely tell you about it when drunk.
photo: CMU School of Computer Science
Model Students/Geniuses
Type 1: Always participate in class. Sigh extravagantly to let everyone know just how much work they have to do. Hunt is their second home.
Type 2: Never go to class but still get a 4.0 QPA. Probably only 16 years old.
Both types are your goal in life, and your worst enemy.
Frat Boys
Rolled shorts, friendly smiles, overwhelmingly self-assured auras. Hide their fuckboy tendencies by identifying themselves along with the rest of us “CMU nerds.”
You’d think even at CMU they’d be reasonably intelligent, but for some reason they just don’t show it.
Party Girls
At every pregame, frat party, house party, club, and electro music festival. Roll molly on preplanned weekends then complain about the aftereffects on Sunday night while doing all their homework.
You might not even see these people in your classes until final exams. They’ll still probably do better than you, and it’ll drive you mad.
Homebodies
Never seen outside their rooms except when going to class. Hate talking to people, or interacting with the human race in any way.
Hipsters
Doc Martens, chunky sweaters. Mostly art and design students, but occasionally writers or rebellious engineers. Post obscure Instagram photos with even odder captions. Don’t call them hipsters. They’re definitely hipsters.
Music and Drama Students
Rarely seen, but always heard. Sing and gesture wildly at the UC, in the bathroom, probably in their sleep. “I’m not being loud, my voice just naturally carries.”
Photo: CMU School of Drama)