What you should be drinking this New Year’s Eve based on your college

We all deserve a night of partying after such a dramatic year — to celebrate the end of 2016 and welcome 2017 with a few drinks in hand.

Based on your college will it be a wine or tequila kind of night?

College of Engineering

You’ll drink tequila shots all night. You’re part of the work hard, play hard mindset and after that rough semester of mechanics, physics, and who knows what other rocket science nonsense they have you doing, you’re ready to put the past in the past and start fresh. You’re organized though, so you’ll do it right. Salt, tequila, lime. The shots you take will always be in that order even when you’re hours deep. You’ll be by the bar all night downing tequila shots and wondering how you’re going to balance your hell of a schedule next semester. Just remember you chose your major; the major did not choose you.

Sargent

Vodka with club soda is the drink for you. Your healthy ass wouldn’t stand to let loose even for the New Year. Your New Year’s Resolution is probably along the lines of bike-riding and running more and eating out less. Why not ruin the fun of New Year’s and start before the ball drops. You’ll refuse any mixed drinks because of sugar intake and mix your Absolut with a perfect amount of club soda and sip all night. There’s no foggy memories for you; you love your body and know too much about how the liver filters what you put in it.

College of Communication

A mixed drink that’s worthy of an instagram. COM kids are all about the image so whatever drink is the most festive is the one for them. Edible sparkles? A COM kid is there. You’ll get to the party with your own customized shaker and mix a bunch of different alcohols and colors to ensure you have the most aesthetically pleasing drink. You’ll be drunk after a drink and a half because you don’t know anything about mixing ratios of fruit juice to Bacardi but that’s okay because even if you vomit at the end of the night that’ll make a great story for your blog.

Questrom

You’ll enjoy a nice glass of scotch on the evening of New Year’s because nothing screams pretentious like a college student drinking scotch. You’ll get it from your father’s den and sip on it using the hand that sports your very flashy watch. Throughout the night, you’ll only talk to adults and try to network yourself an internship and you’ll use the scotch as a conversation starter. You think you’re sophisticated beyond your years but have fun with that while the rest of us go funnel champagne into our bodies.

School of Hospitality

School of Hospitality students, you’ll be hosting the party tonight since event planning is your forte. All night you’ll be serving wines that compliment the catered food you have delivered and you’ll match your meal with your wine all night. After the food is served you’ll stick to champagne. This is a celebration afterall and you want to reign in 2017 with class so Prosecco it is for you guys. But please, I know you took Fine Wines this semester, but you’re not even halfway into your 20s yet so stop pretending you’re all wine experts already.

CFA

I know you think these lists are stupid and minimize your individuality but we all know you’ll be drinking Bourbon because you wouldn’t be caught dead drinking the alcohol that any other college student would drink. You’re not just a college student you’re a cool college student who thinks outside the box and breaks boundaries for college kids everywhere. After you drink Bourbon you’ll probably discuss the latest rendition of a Midsummer’s Night Dream you just saw and how awfully done it was because you’re an expert of the theater at such a ripe young age.

CAS

CAS you won’t just stick to one kind of alcohol tonight. You’re an indecisive bunch unsure of what you want out of life. Your career will probably in no way reflect your major of psychology or political science it’s just an option that allows for a lot of flexibility in your schedule. You like to test the waters so you might indulge in some vodka and rum and then later on have a margarita to balance the other two out. If everybody else is drinking whiskey though you’ll follow the pack because you want to be on the in-crowd even though you’re confused as to what that entails. Nice try though, whiskey was so 2010.

School of Education

You are sweet and nurturing people who want to educate the youth of America, we get it. You’re the mom of the group at every party but it is New Year’s so you won’t be a total bore. You’ll allow yourself a martini with two green olives and sip on it throughout the evening. Once you’re buzzed you’ll be the one hanging out with children on the floor all night making funny faces at them. Have fun with the five year olds I’ll be working on a New Year’s kiss.

College of General Studies

You guys don’t even know where you’re going to go for the party until the night of. You wait and see which party is the biggest and loudest before making a decision because duh, partying is life. You won’t bring up classes or GPAs once during New Year’s because sometimes you forget that you even go to college for the academics. You’ll drink beer throughout the night because it brings you back to your glory days: high school. You’ll reminisce on how popular you once were and drink Keystone Light because back in the day it was all the rave.