Gary Johnson has an erection and he wants you to know about it

Why does the Libertarian’s campaign video look like an ad for ED medicine?

This had to be deliberate. 

Gary Johnson’s campaign videos appeal to a few crowds: 1) libertarians 2) people trying to salvage the election 3) middle aged men suffering from the hell that is erectile disfunction.

His promotional videos scream “I am a middle-aged man who can still get down (or up)!”

He also shouted, “government is too big” and “[debt] rising is unsustainable”. He is hiding nothing.

Good ‘ol Gary, the man is still going. Although this does beg the question, does he support big pharma!? Has Pfizer endorsed this legend yet?

Just look at him go.

Competing against young men and their inherent abilities

Competing against young men and their inherent abilities

This man’s campaign slogan is “Keep Calm and Gary On”- I don’t know how he can stay calm when his constituents are excited all the time.

Enduring the stormy cold- surely he can warm up in a tent with his wife at the end of the hike

Reaching peaks of all sorts

Johnson once said, “Wear a suit with patches from your big contributors. Depending on the size of the contribution, that’s how big the patch should be.” Could he be more explicit?

His no-longer flaccid junk surely inspires a socially liberal America, although we can’t count on the government subsidizing an ED prescription.

Plot twist: this is an actual viagra commercial. Can we even tell the difference at this point?

Plot twist: this is an actual viagra commercial. Can we even tell the difference at this point?

I would have loved to see Gary Johnson join Trump and Rubio’s debate on small hands. His insight would be remarkable.

He is beaming like an absolute star.

happiness and sexual health have never looked more promising

happiness and sexual health have never looked more promising

This man will last four years. Maybe even eight!

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And his fiancée is loving it.

(Courtesy of Gary Johnson)

(Courtesy of Gary Johnson)

 

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