Why summer is actually the worst season

I am part of a select few people who hate summer. Yes, I understand it’s a time of leisure. Yes, I understand school is out. Yes, I still hate it.

Summer is excruciatingly boring, and there is only so much money college students can put towards traveling. Not to mention bathing suit and sunglass tan lines are not attractive.

The heat

Summer is a time when the gates of hell open up and consume the mortal world. Summer is always uncomfortably hot and it’s far from relaxing. In Florida, there is never any relief from the heat. I would always rather be cold than hot.

At least in the winter, you are able to layer up and remove the layers according to your comfort level. You are out of luck in the summer. Unfortunately, society tends to disapprove of people stripping down in public. So, as a law abiding citizen, I am forced to endure the heat in my shorts, tank tops and Birkenstocks.

And don’t even get me started on the humidity…curly hair has a mind of its own during this time of year.

Summer classes

Now, if you are part of the responsible few, you may take summer courses. Summer sessions are the bane of every college student’s existence. These courses cram 13 weeks of material into six weeks. “Abandon all hope ye who” take summer classes. Having a test, a paper and 200 pages of required reading due each week is not a walk in the sunshine.

Not only are these classes a pain, they are also expensive. My academic scholarships take a vacation in the summer and leave me paying full tuition for classes.

Bugs

Bug season is among us. There should be a remake of The Birds and it should be renamed The Bugs. Mosquitoes are some coldhearted flies. During the summer, my body transforms into a human connect the dots puzzle. Not only are these bites unsightly to look at, but they itch like no other.

Bikini season

Speaking of bodies, it is bikini season. I am a reasonable person – I eat a salad a day and ride my bike to class. However, bikini season still makes me cringe. Wearing a bikini out in public always brings up all my body-related anxiety. Not to mention the soul crushing feeling when a bathing suit you wore last summer doesn’t fit now. Damn you baby bearing hips and your biological function!

Tourists

Living in Florida, I have come across quite a few aggravating tourists. I believe that when tourists leave their home, they shift into a euphoric state that impairs their ability to watch where they are walking or driving. I have almost been hit so many times when passing by the electrical wires that are positioned to look like Mickey Mouse.

Yes, we all see it – no need to run me off the road because of it. Don’t even get me started on the crowds at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Let me drink my butterbeer and buy overpriced wizard robes in peace.

No schedule

When I don’t have a schedule, I tend to go a little crazy. I need structure in my life, and summer is just one long season of laziness. I need to be on top of things. The whole premise of summer being a time of rest and relaxation does not fit with my personality. That’s why my favorite season is fall because it is a time of fresh starts. The weather is also way better.

All in all, summer sucks. All the good TV shows go on hiatus and iced coffee is overpriced.