Everyday scenarios people with anxiety find absolutely terrifying

Anxiety can be triggered by even the simplest and most irrational of reasons, or it can be triggered by no reason at all. Most people realize that their feelings of anxiousness may be illogical or unwarranted, but that unfortunately does not stop them from happening. Everyday situations that most people wouldn’t think twice about can give people with anxiety inconsolable mental anguish.

Eye contact

For someone who struggles with anxiety, something as seemingly simple and natural as eye contact can be hard. People with anxiety often find it especially scary to be vulnerable with others, and they consider eye contact an expression of vulnerability. When we let people look into our eyes, we feel as though we are subjecting ourselves to evaluation, and we fear that all of our insecurities and flaws are out on display. Thus, we tend to avoid eye contact because we don’t want others to see the things we see wrong with ourselves.

The thought process goes a little something like this: “Ah scary, that person is talking to me, don’t make eye contact. Just look at their mouth, that’s safe right? Do you think they notice that you’re just looking at their mouth? Look at their eyes. Whoa, look away that was scary. No, stop, look at them when they talk to you. There you go. You’re doing it! Ok abort, abort, not that much. What are you trying to do? Hypnotize them? Act natural. Blink, you idiot. Okay scan the room. Now look back to them. Now back to the room. Now back to them. What is this, an Old Spice commercial? This interaction needs to end.”

Talking on the phone

While this anxiety trigger seems incredibly counterintuitive, it is very real. There is something about having to pick up the phone and call a stranger that is so irrationally terrifying. Oddly, you would think talking on the phone would be the preferred method of communication for someone with anxiety, considering you don’t have to deal with the awkwardness of in-person interactions. But for some  reason, the idea of calling an arbitrary number to be picked up by an unfamiliar voice on the other end gives you nightmares.

You find yourself ordering pizza online and asking your parents to make your doctor appointments for you, only to think “how important is my health?” when they throw your age in your face and tell you to do it yourself. Dinner reservations? Nope, you don’t mind waiting. You sort through a clusterfuck of yahoo answers to figure out why your computer is making that weird noise because you can’t bear the thought of calling Tech Support. If you have phone anxiety, then you know the sentence “just call and ask” sends shivers down your spine.

Seeing people you “know” in public

There’s nothing worse than seeing someone you kind of know, but aren’t officially friends with, in public. Do you say hi? Do you ignore them? What is the protocol??? While most people would probably just say hi like normal humans, people with anxiety will overthink this situation until they convince themselves that the best solution is to pretend the person in question doesn’t exist. What if they don’t know who you are? You can’t risk the humiliation that would ensue were they to reject your attempt at mutual acknowledgement.

Don’t look at me

“So what if we’ve met a million times and follow each other on Instagram?” you think. “To them, I’m probably just one of the many. There’s no way they remember me. They definitely don’t remember my name. I don’t want to embarrass them, right? I’m doing this for THEM. I’m just going to keep my eyes glued to my phone and pretend I don’t even see them. It’s not rude if they don’t think I see them.”

You then end up taking some long, convoluted route just to avoid crossing paths with this person, even though they’ve already spotted you and can see past your obvious texting facade. And if you don’t say hi to someone once, it sets the precedent for all future encounters with that person. So you make a habit of pretending you don’t know people because you’re afraid they won’t wave back to you, thereby discouraging them from waving to you. Thanks, anxiety.

Trader Joe’s

If you are easily overwhelmed by chaos, AKA being trapped in a tiny grocery store  filled beyond max capacity with health-conscience soccer moms and their accompanying dependents (children and shopping carts), then Trader Joe’s is probably your worst nightmare. For someone with anxiety, there is never a good time to go to Trader Joe’s. No matter when you go, you will want to stab yourself with the impossibly adorable cacti for sale at the entrance.

In times of stress I am forced to create my own safe space between the organic eggs and my shopping cart

Living with anxiety can be incredibly challenging and at times debilitating. While you know your fears may be unfounded, that does not make them any less hard to overcome. There may be times when your anxiety consumes you and prevents you from doing things you wish you could, but are too afraid, to do. While “in reality” these feelings of anxiousness may seem silly to those who do not experience them, people who suffer from them know all too well that anxiety doesn’t care about reality.