How do you stay connected to your ‘old’ friends?

Growing up is harder than it looks


Almost everyone has that group of friends they met in high school that they refuse to lose touch with. You move on to college and catch up when you’re home on break. But then you face the biggest challenge yet…adulthood.

When you go into the workforce and start working a 9-5 job 5 days a week, it’s hard to fit in time to hang out with your old friends. The weekends are for catching up on laundry and tackling the mound of dirty dishes in the sink, not partying all night and recovering all day. Priorities change overtime, but the need for social connection doesn’t.

Whether it’s studying abroad in Europe or moving 4 hours away to get their dream job, friends are pulled different directions and it takes effort to keep the connection alive. We asked young adults how they keep “the squad” close as they transition into adulthood.

Kyle Schwendiman, 20, Appalachian State University

“My friends and I have a group message we communicate in. Everyone can share details and events with each other and it makes it easy to stay updated.”

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Marshall Bradley, 21, University of South Carolina

“They don’t always reply to my messages, but ask me in 10 years if we’re still close.”

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Allison Jasne, 19, Drexel University

“Esther and I met in fall. We’re very similar – we’re both the “Jewish mother” to our friend group, love Vienna Fingers, and theater. We Skype about once a week, and we have an agreement (since we’re roommates next year) about calling each other out if we’re taking over the conversation or something.

“Mostly it’s Skype, and we know we can call, text, or Skype the other when we’re having a bad (or good) day and need to rant or just want to see a friendly face. She also texts me a lot of Pins from Pinterest and I send her Facebook recipes for things like cheesy garlic challah. We also snapchat funny things/faces.”

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Alexis Tolentino, 19, University of Florida

“If they’re genuine, an effort doesn’t really feel like an effort. Like, it just comes so easily to reconnect despite the distance. My two best friends whom I met in the sixth grade go to school in Texas and New York and I’m in Florida. We don’t talk everyday, but when we do, it’s like nothing has changed. I think it’s because our friendship is so solid that we don’t feel the need to constantly talk to each other.”

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Paul Freda, 24, Brielle, New Jersey

“I’m close with like 3 or four people I’m not (physically) close to on a daily basis, and I mainly stay in contact with them via text, Skype or Facebook. I would like to be in contact with more but it’s just very hard and frustrating to have long periods of conversations that way.”

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The key to making friendships last is to take advantage of technology like all of these friends have. Texting, video calls and other methods of communication seem to be a great help for keeping in touch.

Regardless of the miles in between, true friends can pick up where they left off and it easily flows. That’s how you know they’re meant to be in your life, if they stick around even when you go long spans of time without talking to each other.