I tried a seven day crash diet and it didn’t work

I became irritable within three days


We all have that one friend. She eats whatever she wants and then when an event or a vacation is near she goes on an extreme crash diet. It normally lasts about one or two weeks and this person really goes for it. No sugar, limited carbs, and definitely no cheat day or even just a cheat snack. For me, these crash diets never really made sense but I also don’t believe in diets in the first place so I figured I was just being judgemental.

So, I tried this lifestyle for seven days because you can’t knock something unless you try it.

Day one

Day one was interesting. I almost cracked twice because I actually forgot what I was doing. I’ve never thought about what I ate before so this was very new and I realized I’d have to stay focused all week long. For lunch I had a Greek salad from Panera which seems innocent but then they gave me bread… I already ate my carbs for the day at breakfast. The beautiful baguette was staring right into my soul and I had to say no. I ate my first Panera meal without its pairing of a delicious, golden carb. I went to bed actually thinking about food. It’s funny that as soon as you know you are limited with food, you crave all of the junk much more.

Day two

I went to the beach on this day with my friends. Everything was great – I still had my coffee(but black instead of my cinnamon swirl with cream and sugar) and then I enjoyed the day under the sun. I didn’t even think about my cravings until lunch. Beach food is every Jersey Shore gal’s favorite part of summer. We went to a bar and grill right on the beach and as I passed by all the beach sandwiches served with fries on the menu I ordered my greek salad for lunch.

My greek salad was 16 dollars! My friends all paid ten bucks for their greasy sandwiches that I drooled over. Okay as I’m typing this I realize I sound like I have a junk food problem but I am a healthy and active 19-year-old girl who eats what she wants and those wants include salad very often. It’s just now that I knew I couldn’t order what I truly was craving I felt angry no… I felt hangry.

Day three

We’ll talk about my dinner experience. I went to Applebee’s after a long night of work (which entails teaching ballet for hours). I was starving but I knew I’d have to check the menu extra closely instead of ordering my usual wonton tacos and boneless wings. I ended up getting a half-priced appetizer that was modified. Spinach and Artichoke Dip is a crowd-favorite and I ordered it with vegetables instead. This proved to be delicious honestly and more tasty than the standard chips it comes with. Even my friends thought this was a solid choice. On my drive home I felt more satisfied than the previous two days.

Day four

I woke up with a giant migraine and I was craving salt. I wanted chips or a sandwich or something of that nature so I settled for a chocolatey-pretzel special K bar. But all day I couldn’t shake that migraine. I even stuck to the eight glasses of water a day rule for this week but still nothing helped. I just tried not to focus on it throughout the day and got an apple-ginger juice in the afternoon. This actually made the difference. If I learned anything this week, it’s to eat lots of fruit when dieting because you need energy and it fills you up quickly.

Day five

Saturday was a day I had been looking forward to all week: My grandpa’s 80th birthday party. When we arrived, we were all offered celebratory beer and wine but I was forced to turn it down because crash dieters would never dare drink alcohol and let themselves bloat. As everyone is drinking and dancing I am just excited to hear the dinner options at this venue. The waiter tells us for the event we have a choice of Veal Parmigiana, Chicken Balsamico, Filet Mignon, and Linguini with Clams. Linguini with Clams was staring into my soul the entire dinner that I ate my Chicken Balsamico. I’m not even a fan of balsamic dressing but my diet picked my dinner not me.

Day six

I am Italian and it was Sunday. Please somebody give me the strength to not eat pasta at this authentic Italian restaurant. I was in a bad mood all dinner. I was actually frustrated that I could not order what I wanted at this point. I ate tilapia which, admittedly was delicious, but “Sunday Sauce” is a tradition of my culture that I did not participate in this week. This diet ended up enveloping a lot more of my life than I initially thought and I was looking forward to Monday.

Day seven

A measly Monday was my last day of this torture. I woke up in a horrible mood because it’s already a Monday and on top of that I was hungry. No I wasn’t hungry for a kale salad, or quinoa, I was hungry for a damn burger. I wanted to feel overly-full. I wanted to eat until I slipped into a giant food-coma that could not be cured. I felt as if I was a lunatic but I couldn’t help it. I’ve never felt this way about food in my life and as I pushed through this one last day I realized that I didn’t feel skinnier or better about myself at all.

All I have to say is I am grateful that this week is over. I have never thought about food so much in one week. I thought about my next meal instantly after i had just finished one and it caused me to be crankier than ever before. I also learned some healthy habits as well though. Apples are a great midday snack when you’re feeling tired and hungry. Also drinking eight glasses of water a day actually cleared up my skin and was a natural moisturizer. When I became hydrated, so did my skin. Not eating late at night really helped bloating and wasn’t that hard to do either.

Overall crash diets do not work. I didn’t lose weight and I didn’t feel good either. Next time you feel like you need to look a certain way for an event then try exercising months before or slightly altering your lifestyle because crash-dieting will cause more harm than good.

Now excuse me while I stuff my face with a giant plate of nachos with extra cheese.