Please stop asking me if I’m going to dye my hair back

My hair has gone through a pretty drastic transformation over the past few years.

I used to have long brown hair.

Then I got it cut.

Then I bleached my hair.

Twice.

Finally, I dyed it.

In short, my hair’s gone through orange (first bleach job, absolutely awful), platinum (second bleach job, better, still bad), purple and blonde, fuchsia (the best one, probably), green, and now some shade of blue.

Sometimes, my hair is a great conversation starter. I’ve met great people through conversations on the topic of my hair. Other times though, it’s a way for people to tell me they think I’m crazy and that I’ve ruined my hair.

Why did you dye your hair?

OK, to be fair, this question can be great. It all depends on the tone, though. Sometimes, the tone seems to say, “What on earth have you done to yourself?” rather than “It’s kinda cool that you did this!” or “I’m actually curious!”

The former usually happens with my sisters, because they have the guts to just throw it at me.

First of all, it’s my own hair. Why does it matter? Also, it’s going to grow back. I’m so sorry for temporarily changing my hair color to something that you don’t like.

Are you going to dye it back?

The worst incident I had with this was a friend offering to buy me black hair dye. Yeah. He wasn’t a fan. This was during the orange hair phase, so a lot of people didn’t like it, but it still stung a tad.

Not, with my blue hair, the answer is still no. It cost a pretty penny to bleach it the second time. It’d be a waste of money and time, and I’d still have damaged hair. May as well enjoy the color if I can’t enjoy silky smooth hair.

And yes, it’s my fault that my hair isn’t silky anymore, but again, hair grows back.

What do your parents think?

This is usually something older people, namely my family members, ask me. Every time I’m asked this, I feel like the person wants to hear that my parents don’t like it so they can feel better about not liking it themselves. Maybe they like relating to the whole “Ah yes, my teenage daughter once rebelled, too!” thing. I don’t know. Maybe they’re just making conversation.

Either way, I get asked this all the time, and no, they’re not fans. They’ll get over it, though. After all, “it’s just hair.” Which brings me to my next point…

At least it’s just your hair

I don’t think people realize how rude this is. It implies you don’t like my hair, which is fine, but beyond that, it implies something about what I can and can’t do with my body.

Some people won’t just imply that, they just say “Next up is a tattoo!” I mean… really? Is that necessary? Honestly, when people say this, I can hear the “She’s gone crazy” in their minds.

The other questions can be conversational, but this is just unnecessary.

Honestly, I love my hair. Looking back, it wasn’t always great (the orange hair? Yikes!). But did it affect me in any negative ways? No.

Before I dyed my hair, I felt lost at school. I was drowning amidst crowds as I walked around campus. I had lost my sense of individuality. I needed a change, and bleaching my hair was that change. Even while my hair looked horribly orange, I was happy. I regained my sense of individuality. My crazy hair gave me confidence.

Sure, it’s damaged from the bleach. People say a lot of things to me, which are sometimes rude, but usually they’re actually not. I love my hair, whether it’s brown, blonde, pink, or blue – and it’s gonna keep changing colors until it grows out. And maybe then, I’ll do it all over again.