Dear British men, come to America. The accent slays

It is a fantasy that has played out in the minds of young British men for generations. You hop off the plane, glide through customs, hail a yellow cab. Within minutes, you’re forcing your way through the crowd in a busy Manhattan bar.  In an attempt to attract the bartender’s attention, you lean in, clear your throat and say “excuse me…could I possibly trouble you for a pint of lager?”

The room goes silent. You look around, and it dawns on you that every pair of female American eyes is resting on you, stood there, in your Ben Sherman button-up and tan chinos. Turning to your left, the most attractive girl in the bar is slack-jawed in astonishment. She realizes you’re looking, composes herself, and drawls that fateful phrase:

“Oh my God. Are you from England?”

It never actually happens though does it? The hint of a British accent doesn’t really elicit a nationwide knicker-dropping for southern belles and West Coast worldies alike. In fact, you’d back the Bud Light-chugging dickhead frat bro or leather jacket-wearing, smooth Ryan Gosling type to get the girl over a stammering, skittish limey…wouldn’t you?

We asked American men whether they think they have better game than their counterparts over the pond. Some of their answers may surprise you.

Jermaine, 26, New York, NY

“The British guys are like wolves. They move in packs. It looks like they banter in hopes that women overhear or see the group and want to be a part of it. In England I saw more emphasis on being the top dog than being suave.

“In America they’re a novelty and the accent attracts. They work behind closed doors once they start talking, they don’t really make moves in front of the pack. It might be because they don’t want to seem soft, or probably because boys might sabotage.

“Also, British men don’t dance. I went to a club in Liverpool, all girls dancing. Not a single guy. So I danced and it was ridiculous.”

Sean, 22, Hilliard, OH

“I think the difference is crucial. If you’re fat, balding, whatever, that could be a HUGE detriment to those of us with regular accents. British dudes on the other hand will always have a leg up with their charming accents.

“I would say there is a stigma of timid British men. Americans are stereotyped as overtly confident a lot of times, and this can have a strong upside in a loud, crowded bar or club. British men would have better game in a more conversational environment, assuming these stereotypes hold true.”

Rashad, 19, Miramar, FL

“If you have an accent, you automatically start at a 6 in America. End any sentence with “innit” or say “mum” or “pint” and suddenly the conversation shifts from ‘let’s be friends’ to ‘what’s your Snap?’

“British guys don’t need to have that much game when the accent comes out. Girls drop the panties immediately.

“Unfortunately American guys suck, just naturally. We make up for it with insane frat parties and ridiculous, sometimes unnecessary, drinking methods.”

Max, 18, Fredericksburg, VA

“They seem to be pretty shy, but that accent, like, damn.

“We have a load of guys from St Andrews here at William and Mary, so I’m fairly informed of the difference. The Scottish guys are real shy, but there aren’t many of them.

“The British guys from St Andrews are very loud generally, also very wealthy. The number one way to the heart is a nice meal and some champagne.”

Patrick, 20, Jacksonville, FL

“So, in general, southern American men view British men as frail and feminine. They need their tea, skinny jeans and teacup yorkies with them at all times. American men in the south view themselves as basically John Wayne – masculine and rough, but can clean up and be a gentleman to the ladies.

“As far as pulling ladies, British men aren’t really seen as men, but boys, so the girls they attract like the boyish charm that many possess. Their baby-faces paired with their high voices attract a very specific type of girl.

“One thing they have going for them though is their accent. If you can find an American girl who doesn’t get annoyed with the pompous and too-proper British accent, then odds are she would marry a Brit as soon as she meets one. The accent pulls.

“Now American men are different. We don’t have to be always be dressed in our most fashionable and up-to-date clothing. We can take girls on adventures without worrying about our beanie getting dirty or our loafers getting wet. Girls ‘love a sense of adventure in a man. They want someone who can take them rock climbing, hiking and let loose but also can clean up, take them to dinner and be a gentleman.

“To put it simply, American men are the big spoon, British men are the little spoon.”

Odain, 25, New York, NY

“I feel like Brits don’t beat around the bush. It depends where the girl is from – American girls eat that accent shit up though.

“Who’s better in general? Americans baby! There are lots of variables though – Brits being shit dancers is a main one. They do have the edge with the accent though – and they’re probably better dressed.”

Carter, 20, Athens, GA

“Having a British accent is probably one of the best icebreakers a guy could ask for. It’s just so different! If you went downtown in Athens, girls would be all over y’all. Even if it is just for a good conversation.

“What do American guys do better? It’s so hard to generalize, but American guys can be great with confidence and introducing themselves.”

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