Warwick is now the sixth best uni in the UK

‘It helps my parents brag to their friends whose children are less intelligent than myself’


Time to celebrate – Warwick University is now the sixth best in the country, according to the Times and Sunday Times University League Table 2016.

Since we’ve jumped two places from eighth position last year, freshers about to take up their place at Warwick can now bathe themselves in smugness.

Maintaining a trend, this is the second year in a row that we have risen by two places. Warwick now ranks higher than Exeter, LSE and UCL to name but a few.

But who actually beat us? Scooping first place was Cambridge, followed by more of the usual big names – Oxford was second, Imperial third, St Andrews fourth and Durham fifth before yours truly in sixth.

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“The illustrious and ever-expanding grounds” 

Professor Sir Nigel Thrift, the university’s outgoing vice-chancellor commented : “This consistent endorsement of Warwick’s achievements as a university are a tribute to the work of Warwick staff and students that has underpinned that success.”

The news was reassuring for second-year Engineering student Hamish, who said: “Maybe this will make my parents take my degree seriously.”

Also brimming with joy was Bertie, a second year Film Studies student: “I think the University’s new ranking is excellent as it instills me with pride each and every time I walk through the illustrious, ever-expanding grounds of Warwick.

“Not only this but it helps my parents brag to their friends whose children are less intelligent than myself.”