Daylight robbery: Sunshine stolen from second years by bungling builders
No need for factor 25 when you have factor brick
A troop of callous builders stole sunlight from an unhappy second year house.
The house on the notoriously student-infested Tachbrook Road, in Leamington Spa, fell victim to the removal of a vital window when builders decided to brick it up from the outside.
When the five residents found their window half bricked up, they posted a sign begging the builders next door to stop. But the heartless bunch carried on anyway.
In a chilling echo of the inevitable apocalypse which will destroy us all, the hall now has next to no sunlight, a development the five residents were not aware of when they moved in.
Kieran, Vice President of the Physics Society, was truly heartbroken with last week’s renovations.
The second year said: “We didn’t think this house could get any more shit, and then they blocked out the sun.”
As the bricks began to conceal the much needed hall window Kieran hatched a plan – he designed a sign would hopefully melt the builders hearts and stop the bricking up in its tracks.
The sign read “please don’t take my sunshine away” with a sad child like drawn face.
Despite Kieran’s sign, attracted much attention from bewildered builders, the bricks carried on piling up, letting in only a thing stream of sunlight.
The devastating works have earned the house the nickname Tachbrook Prison.
Second year Sociologist and similarly distraught housemate Ellen Holmes said: “No longer can I sing Natasha Bedingfield and relate to every word.
“I haven’t got a pocket full of sunshine and I no longer know if it’s all mine.”