Warwick to set up a campus in California to ‘educate and inform’ the Yanks

When can we transfer


Sunny California will be home to Warwick’s new campus as soon as 2020.

The plans to create another campus have been approved by the University Council.

Many speculated that this rumour would be viable, or that it was even true, but now it has been confirmed that Warwick is working in partnership with the University Develop Trust to make phased developments which ultimately will create a new campus for us to be envious of.

The new campus will be in Placer County, 80 miles northeast of San Francisco, and millions of miles from the rainy Midlands.

Lets leave this bullshit behind.

The first phase of the project is to introduce a small number of postgraduate courses. After this they plan to undergraduate courses for a range of subjects.

Ever a business-orientated University, a press release stated that California was chosen for being the the largest state economy in the US. That is the equivalent to the 8th largest national economy in the world.

They’ve even saved money setting this project up. The plans have all been funded by US donors and the University Development Trust, a non-profit organization.

According to Warwick’s rather arrogant press release, one of their aims for the new campus is for the “educating and informing [of] the American public”.

California’s Provost Professor Stuart Croft is keen for the project. He said: “The vision for the partnership is to produce a full spectrum university, part of the University of Warwick, in California […] The way that we see this developing is for that campus to be an integral part of this university”

The Chair of Warwick’s Council, Sir George Cox, said: “It will provide a boost to our global and US profile which is terribly important for us. Longer term, it will hopefully produce all kinds of ways in which staff can interact in the United States more easily and more extensively.”

“It will also produce all sorts of ways in which students will have extraordinary opportunities extended to them which they would never have had before. That is exciting however you look at it.”

Even Scott Miles, a Discrete Maths fresher, said: “My plan now is to drop out of Warwick and come back when I can transfer to California. I’m sick and tired of the U1, the weather, and the racist swans”.

Second year English student Michael Rodgers commented: “This is exciting news. I can finally be like a California girl: unforgettable”.