An exclusive interview: “I’m known as Naked Rootes Girl”

She spooned a box of cereal

You may have heard the legend of “Naked Rootes Girl” during Freshers. 

There were reported sightings of an unidentified midnight streaker visiting various different kitchens around campus accommodation. Rumours of “Naked Rootes Girl” had even reached Westwood.

This anonymous BNOC tells the story of how she ended up in her Birthday suit on top of a fridge in Bluebell.


My life in the nude

It was my first night of Freshers, so I came prepared with plenty of booze and my best banter. Unfortunately, I may have made too much of a lasting first impression after revealing more than necessary after a game of Never Have I Ever.

I can definitely confirm that there was a Full moon out that night after things took a turn for the worst for my friend after her sixth voddie crannie.

The last thing I remember (after rapping the whole of Black Eyed Peas “Where Is The Love” complete with a Glen’s vodka bottle microphone) was being introduced to the card game ‘Strip Jack Naked’. Unfortunately I took the rules a little too literally and thus proceeded to strip down to my undies.

Drinkz and bantz

Drinkz and bantz (with some really young-looking freshers)

Several freshers have tales of bumping into the infamous nudist when she visited Rootes, Bluebell and Whitefield kitchens.

Sam Jennings, who used to live in Whitefields in his first year, had a close encounter with Naked Rootes Girl.

He said: “We heard a knock at the door and a girl dressed only in bra and shorts ran in saying she was drunk and lost.

“She joined the rest of my housemates on the sofa in our living room but before long had slumped off and decided that under the table would be a better place to talk to us from.

“After getting to know her a bit better she eventually remembered she lived somewhere in Rootes and we gradually persuaded her it was time to go home.

Naked rootes girl in her head.

Naked Rootes girl in her head.

“There’s a bit of dispute within the house as to whether she took her bra off at one point, however she’s still known to us all as Naked Rootes Girl.”

However, Naked Rootes Girl thought that Bluebell was a better place to settle down for the night.

She said: “I woke up in the morning on top of a fridge in Bluebell spooning a Family Sized box of Kellogg’s Cornflakes with absolutely no memory of the night before.

“I snuck away (with a handful of stolen cereal) in the early hours of the morning, keeping to the shadows to preserve my dignity, back to Rootes.”