Warwick’s Worst Valentine’s Gifts

We know that men can tend to struggle with Valentine’s Day gifts, especially at Warwick. As the big day approaches The Tab conducted some research amongst female students about the worst gifts they’ve received over the years and revealed some, well, astonishing results…

Some of the presents were surprisingly unorthodox and proved that men can be creative but simultaneously creepy. One girl was treated to a phone call during which she was serenaded with the classic power ballad that is ‘Hero’ by Enrique Iglesias, in a husky monotonous growl.

No doubt she was wishing it really was Enrique…

But things got weirder, as one student revealed to the Tab that she was once treated with an antique letter opener, because you know, if it can double up as a deadly weapon it must be the perfect Valentine’s gift. What was ever stranger was the fact that she was 11 at the time…

Sinister fetish?

What became increasingly clear was boys’ ability to be surprisingly thrifty – an unsigned card because he wanted to be able to reuse it the next year? Genius. Another poor lad seemed to be taking tips from that long-lost auntie who you never see but always receive birthday cards from, as he gave his girlfriend a five pound note whilst lovingly telling her to “do with it what you will, sweetheart”. Now that really is living up to the stereotype of student budgeting!

A common trend seemed to be an attempt to combine a gift with a helpful hint or advice, which didn’t always go down well with the ladies, shockingly. A loving gift of toothpaste could perhaps be overlooked, but a gym membership or even worse, a razor, is going a tad too far. A joke present of a book on “How to make a good sandwich” could perhaps be salvaged unless it’s evident there’s no serious present to join it…

The Tab weren’t given details as to what extent any of these presents backfired on the lads, but we can only assume the worst.

Take a hint?

Finally boys, there’s definitely a more tactful time to dump a girl than on Valentine’s Day and definitely a more tactful way than our last story: a girl who was given a “grow your own boyfriend” toy before swiftly being given the boot. What a charmer.

So boys, think about your Valentine’s gifts carefully, or your girlfriend may not be so willing for you to do any unwrapping of your own…