Who’s the maddest fresher in the UK?

Freshers are mad. Like, mad mad. But out of all the ickle freshers in the whole of the UK, who’s the absolute maddest?

We thought we’d let you, our esteemed readers, choose – so take a look below and decide.

Fraser, Aberdeen

“Fraser Mackenzie maxed out his £1,500 overdraft despite receiving £475 a month from his student loan (totalling around £1,900 so far) and having savings worth as much as £3,000. These expenses covered alcohol, food and police fines including two appearances in court – both funny, not serious).”

Rory, Bristol

“UBSC legend Rory Moss’ interests include swimming in frozen lakes and wandering the streets of Edinburgh alone. Rory lives by the Kanye West philosophy for life, “In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take”, and he embodies it whole-heartedly – even if it means licking a urinal after losing odds or streaking through Hiatt Baker.”

Emma, UCL

“Back home she’s called a mad-ed and there’s not much she wouldn’t try.” You name it. Whether it’s hundreds of shots or something stronger, Emma is completely OK with the risk of liver failure.”

Vanessa, UCL

“She goes all in. Literally. If Vanessa says she’s interested in an event, she means it. Vanessa goes to EVERYTHING. She’s never missed a night out, she’s always suited in the waviest garms, and always fitting a slut drop somewhere in there.”

Luke, Aberdeen

“Luke Channon shaved his head and eyebrows on the ski trip. It was his birthday that day and we’d just been at the pub drinking Leffe, some European beer or something out of these mad beer bongs. We had to go buy scissors from the shop to start it then shaved the rest.”

Tom, Cambridge

“Tom Gibbs has an allergy to VKs and has heart palpitations without a steady Bullingdon beat pumping through his ears.”

Sam, Cambridge

“With the red strip in his hair which he changes to reflect his mood, you never know where you stand with this Sam ‘Pash’ Gibb. Watch out for this up-and-comer, he’s already a big left wing campaigner and will be sure to revive Oxford with a new coat of rainbow paint and political correctness.”

Kayode, Bristol

“Kayode shot to fame after a post-ball encounter with one of his lecturers, leading to an altercation that rightly earns him his place on this list. Kayode says he still hasn’t spoken to the lecturer since the night of the incident, and is unsure as to why she was getting angry with him and his friends.

“Along with the incident at the law ball, Kayode has also gained his fame for his antics at the various clubs of Bristol: in a more recent event, he was kicked out of Lakota for allegedly stealing one of the toilet attendant’s lollipops.”

Rob, UEA

“After he was caught smoking on the LCR dancefloor, Rob shot to fame as the University of East Anglia’s resident party animal by turning up to the LCR in nothing but a towel and breaking out his notorious ‘busty Cinderella’ costume at his sixth form prom.

“Rob has also operated a crane drunk, fallen out of a bus window and been banned from Stagecoach for a week.”

Kerra, Bristol

“Kerra Pringles’ campus fame began on the very first night of university, when she told the bouncers at Bunker that her grandfather invented Pringles, which led to her and all her friends gaining free entry.

“Like others in our maddest fresher competition, Kerra’s main exploits have taken place in the cramped nightclubs of Bristol. The night when she got trapped in a rubber ring she wore to the O2 and had a boy gnaw it off with his teeth will go down in history. Then, at SWX she lost both shoes on the dance floor and ended up covered in blood from falling over.”

Katherine, UCL

“Katherine consumed more alcohol in her first two days of uni than in her whole life, and the newly intoxicated fresher never fails to put on a show. She’s made a habit of throwing up in her Jimmy Choos, and getting kicked out of Loop has, inevitably, become a regular occurrence.

“Her attitude to everything is ‘DON’T CARE’, to the extent she’s even broke into UCL after hours to crack out those H-Town moves on the main steps of the Portico.”

Charlie, Oxford

“Charlie MacVicar, general Drama BNOC, wishes he went to Leeds because Oxford just doesn’t have enough edges. I mean, look at him.”

Bradleigh, UCL

“The knobhead drank 24 cans in one night with a mate with a tactical puke after 21, and then proceeded to finish the rest off. He did 17 nights in a row during Freshers’, bought drinks on an Economics FREE pub crawl because he was that bollocksed, and even managed to max out his overdraft before the end of Freshers’.”

Joshua, UCL

“He’s managed to be drunk before pre-drinks have even started, despite having a full day of lectures. He constantly turns a ‘quiet pint’ into a full on drinking spree to the point we thought buying Leffe and Lambrini was a good idea.”