Could Stirling Uni’s promo video be any cheesier?

Are you ready to be inspired?

Well that’s a shame because this tired and  surprisingly Aryan promotional video for Stirling University will do anything but inspire.

Yes it really has everything. From the upbeat guitar riffs in the background, to the attractive guy stroking books in the library, to footage of a man on a running machine, all clumsily glued together in a montage of students laughing for reasons beyond our understanding.

The video carefully reminds us that University isn’t all walking in the sun and playing sports, its also about twister and making promotional videos with the same actors dressed slightly differently in each shot.

The reality of Stirling is rather different. Students found between the library bookshelves are more likely to be crying away the tears of their 2:2 rather than stroking books and looking intensely at copies of “The Drying of Paint: An Overview.”

Touching books inquisitively is the last thing on his mind

To add to the theme of deceit in the video, in all of the footage of the library, I don’t see one homeless student. Instead, they show footage of available computers and students getting work done. Meaning there’s no way this video was shot between the hours of 8am through to 2am.

No cameo in the video for Stirling’s mystery library girl

The majority of the video consists of brief flashes of students doing things, usually looking at something as inane and arbitrary as the promotional video itself.

One other clear scene features students passing the time with a fun game of twister in their idyllic clean flat, notice the distinct lack of rats / bats / vomit / mould (delete as appropriate) in their flat.

This is why real students have problems playing twister

Obviously the University can’t encourage the consumption of alcohol, so that feature of Uni life doesn’t make an appearance, but the University doesn’t seem to have any problem with loading the actors in this video up with drugs.

In one scene you can spot a girl laughing at a mug of coffee, another seen shows a guy stroking library books, there’s even a scene where you can see a guy running, no he’s not late for his bus and no he’s not trying to get in the shower first, he’s just running for fun. These people are off their fucking nut.

I can see why Stirling University haven’t asked me to do the promo video, since my views are maybe a little too bleak, but surely they can do better than this?

Stirling, the end of the road