Book Review: The Boys Who Wouldn’t Grow Up

The Boys Who Wouldn’t Grow Up seemed like an appealing read: it was written by St Andrews alum Lauren B. Mangiaforte, based closely on student life in St. Andrews and appeared on several Buzzfeed articles. I expected a book that was light hearted and funny, but still witty, coming from someone with such an impressive academic background as Mangiaforte. Unfortunately, this was not the case. I would say that in finishing the book, it is not necessarily that it became more pleasurable to read, but one gets used to the author’s style and portrayal of our quaint little town.

The first thing that struck me from the offset was the constant references made to wealth and designer clothing. If money was not directly spoken about then instead the writer would go into frustratingly specific detail about the thread count of her characters’ bed linen. Every possession could be (and was) turned into a symbol of wealth and status. I might be in the minority for taking this view, but I think there is more to students in St. Andrews than the wealth we amass as a populace. If the characters in this book were as wealthy as they were portrayed to be, then surely every designer label they owned need not be shoved in the reader’s face. For anyone who appreciates subtlety in their writing this is not the book for you. In this sense, it felt almost hard to believe that someone who had attended the university could have written this book, as it relied on every stereotype that outsiders have of our students.

One thing that is true to St. Andrews life is the book’s calendar: the plot flows from one May Dip to the next, giving us insight into the characters’ final year. It was entertaining to successfully anticipate what event the characters were going to be going to next – it would appear the St. Andrews social calendar is a timeless one. This was one of the few redeeming features of the book, as I can understand it may be nice for past and present alumni to read and recognise a part of their time here.

The parables of St. Andrews life were at first irritating, but eventually became comical. St. Andrews became St. Albas, South Street became Sea Street, The Saint became The Martyr, etc. They were so obvious that I wonder why the writer was compelled to use them in the first place. This continued in reference to characters, as Mangiaforte felt the need to write that they were not based on anyone living or dead, and that any similarities were mere coincidence. However, throughout you get the distinct feeling you are reliving a detailed account of someone else’s year here.

One expectation was right – it was an easy read, perhaps frustratingly so. The book is predominantly plot driven with little wider meaning beyond the content of its pages. Simple to follow if not with one of the most melodramatic endings I have read. Characters are fleshed out with an excessive quantity of problems but very little substance. The content of the book was driven around a small group of friends and their interconnections. The dramatic love lives of this group are quite extraordinary – it would seem the quest to find a St Andrews husband is a real tough fight for some, one that they are willing to do just about anything for!

It is hard to not find yourself plodding through the plot gaining little attachment to any of the protagonists, although this was perhaps intentional. Mangiaforte lists at the back of the book questions for study groups (somewhat ambitiously), and in them concedes that “many of the characters in the story are highly smackable” before posing the question of which would you most like to “hit upside the head”. A small insight into the author’s approach to characterisation and sense of vocabulary.

However, all that being said, if you find your brain shrivelling up into a prune like state this exam season, this book will provide a break from all the Kant and Shakespeare you have to read. It may be a comfort to read something so easy, if going out for a drink is just not an option (read: you have an exam the next day). If nothing else, I expect that, love it or hate it, it will inspire some interesting debates around the kitchen table about life here in St Andrews and reflection upon one’s own experiences here (although *spoiler* yours will never be as dramatic as theirs, sorry).