Lines to ensure you score in St Andrews

Need help taking home members of the opposite sex? These lines should do the trick

empire fs katemiddleton standrews union

So, Freshers’ Week is officially over. Hormones have been flying around for the past week and a half, and chances are you were left rejected at least once or twice by that special someone you were persistently hitting on in the Union. But, have no fear! There are still plenty of opportunities in the coming weeks and months to get your charm on and seduce whoever takes your fancy. Let’s be honest, after your fourth tequila shot at Opening Ball or Bongo, you’re going to be feeling a little frisky. Inhibitions will be low, and that’s when it’s time to make your move. Don’t worry about the inevitable string of drunken nonsense that will probably fall out of your mouth – The Stand has got you covered! Check out our top ten pick-up lines that will certainly help you score.

1. “I want to visit your Netherlands” – You’ve probably had about fifty people ask you where you’re from, and it was a boring question the first time. Why not spice things up a bit by opening with a cheeky pun instead?

2. “Wanna get this Empire to go?” – Empire is one of St Andrews’ finest hook-up spots, so you should aim to grab your cheesy chips and take them home with the nearest member of the opposite sex. Super smooth.

3. “Step into my office and take off your pants” – For the drunken medic. Some people take to the blunt approach, but others may not be impressed. Worth a shot.

Grey’s Anatomy’s McDreamy and Meredith getting it on

4. “That suit looks great on you. It would look even better on my floor once we’ve stripped and curled up on the couch in sweatpants, refreshing US Weekly’s website every so often for news on Kate Middleton’s pregnancy” – Painfully accurate. The true depiction of St Andrews student life.

5. “I would let you queue jump me in Tesco at 5pm any day” – Well, we all know what a commitment that is. You’re in.

6. “Wow! Are you an FS model?” – For any freshers who don’t know what this means, this is a compliment. A BIG ONE.

Models strutting their stuff at FS

7. “Where are you from? Would you like to extend International Relations?” – Combining academic puns with drunken flirting. Surely a winner?

8. “I’ve just finished a round of golf. Would you like to be my 19th hole?” – Because let’s be honest, who doesn’t love a creep?

9. “I mean come on, we’re cousins!” – Only in St Andrews.

Mean Girls’ Karen assures us that it’s OK to date our cousins

10. This one is my personal favourite because I think all of us at some point in our university careers have thought “fuck it”, and opted for an evening in drinking tea and being tragic:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5J7znTWijg

 

Images courtesy of www.seventeen.com, www.thethirdcity.org, www.dailymail.com and www.saysomethingsarcasticc.com

Video courtesy of Bo Burnham and WatchVines