Why Scotland should legalize weed
Time to get down with the wacky-tabacky.
As someone well educated in the powers of weed (a GCSE science paper on the medicinal qualities of cannabis counts, right?), I can say it’s an outright shame Scotland isn’t getting down with the wacky tabacky.
There have been calls for legalising weed across the globe and it’s high time for Scotland to do something about it. The Netherlands have boasted being the coolest country in Europe for too long now, and it wouldn’t go amiss for Scotland to make a name for itself as more of a party-country and less for haggis, lochs and a bizarre penchant for Irn Bru and deep-fried Mars bars.
Even certain US states are looking to finally legalise pot, and trust me Scotland, you don’t want America to be cooler than you. We’ve already got a world-wide reputation with the greatness of our whiskey, so why can’t we make our Highlands the Jamaica of the north?
Forget all of the bad ‘class B’ rep weed has gotten over the last several decades (I know the science behind this, remember?) and think of the future. We all know it’s gonna be legal across the Western world in a matter of years, so why doesn’t Scotland get a jump start on its stiff-upper-lipped (read: boring) neighbors? And of course, for all of the economists out there, think of all the financial benefits! We’d boost tourism nationally, and on a smaller scale, we’d damn well make sure all St. Andrean eateries stay in business. We’ll never have to mourn for Butler’s wraps again. Also, wouldn’t it just make our little seaside town an even better place to live? Imagine, after a long boring Sunday of deadlines at the library, you go home, change into your favourite over-sized 80’s rock band tee, light a joint, and really feel Bob Marley?
Imagine going out with friends, and instead of chundering in the Lizard toilets/falling down the travelator/ losing your keys, matric card and phone in different places, you just go for a chill dance and then (inevitably) a bit of Dervish? God knows your liver will thank you. I mean, of course weed can’t ever replace the space spirits fill in our collective hearts, but a little variety never hurt anyone. Wouldn’t all Raisin weekends be more fun with some ganja challenges or a hot-box room of recovery from one sambucca shot too many? Us students would no longer have a reputation for wrecking havoc with road signs on a weekly basis, but would just become a harmless, giggly mass of 20 year olds in the crisp isle of Tescos.
Now, Scotland, don’t you want to make that a reality?
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