Word from the Burgh: Ultimate Procrastination

Last week, I was stuck in Essay Hell, staring at an open Word document and surrounded by library books. It was two in the afternoon, and since settling down at around 11am to start writing the thing, I had managed to get the word count up to an impressive 157 words. I could tell this was going to be a long afternoon, and naturally by this time I’d exhausted all in-house procrastination resources. But obviously I had to check my newsfeed one last time. Oh, one notification. An hour and a half later, I found myself perched at the top of Arthur’s Seat, looking out over the rooftops of Edinburgh.

No matter how studious you are, everyone wants – no, needs – some way to escape the purgatory of essay writing at some point. Besides, holing yourself up in your room for sixteen-hour stretches is not healthy – procrastination is. Being in the Burgh, you’d be mad if you didn’t take advantage of the many alternative ways to waste your time. And anyway, avoiding your essay by watching back-to-back episodes on Netflix is so mainstream.

They say to clear your head, one of the best things you can do is go for a walk. In Edinburgh, you can have a walk up an extinct volcano. Casual. Pretend you’re Emma or Dexter from One Day and take a hike up Arthur’s Seat, a hill so ridiculously climbable that the loads of people do it drunk and in the dark at New Year. You can enjoy the gorgeous views of the city and feel that, no, this isn’t time wasting at all. You’re enjoying nature. Deep.

If, however, you don’t fancy getting your Hunters dirty but are still experiencing work-induced cabin fever, then Calton Hill is your best bet. Stand on the Parthenon-like National Monument and look out across the Firth of Forth while considering life’s important questions. Just make sure your friend Instagrams the shit out of it. All that Neoclassical architecture will make a sweet cover photo.

Okay, so maybe climbing more than 100 metres above sea level isn’t for you. Luckily, Edinburgh has a plethora of (free!) museums and art galleries. The National Galleries have all the big hitters in their collections, from Picasso to Monet, and their exhibitions change all the time. For a hit of nostalgia, the Museum of Childhood is great, if a bit creepy with its entire rooms filled with dolls. My favourite by far is the National Museum of Scotland, a veritable sweet-shop of history and culture, with everything from Napoleon’s tea set to Dolly the sheep. It’s educational, and therefore totally justified.

By this point, even the most hardened of procrastinators will probably be coming round to the realisation that the Monday morning deadline ain’t going nowhere. So you haul yourself to the library in the hope that being in an academic environment will spur you on to get cracking with that essay. Trouble is, there aren’t any free computers on the ground floor. The lift’s broken too, and after your hike up Arthur’s Seat, climbing stairs just seems unnecessary. At least the library café’s open. You’ve got time for a quick coffee, right? 

Image: Extra Medium; Focus Features