Get the Look: Dress Smart

As it’s the beginning of an academic year, I’d like to offer students, old and new, a pearl of wisdom. This invaluable life lesson was overheard in the library last exam period, and is the perfect mantra to to adopt this semester. Don’t worry about those deadline thingmabobs and the 20-point-scale cramping your style. As two wise Rahs declared:

“We’ll totally pass! You just have to dress smart to think smart, don’t ya know?”.

Oh, how I do know. And you’re about to know too. Forget ‘Smart Casual’ – this is a guide to the ‘Smart’ dress code. Never miss out on a First again… 

Get The Look:

Everyone knows the bigger your hair, the bigger your brain. It’s practically science. Ensure your barnet says, “I’m as in control of my hair as I am of my mind” with a dramatic, voluminous beehive. Firstly, because Amy Winehouse was super bright (#rolemodel) and secondly, the runways of S/S 2012 showed that volume is where it’s at. Keep yours as firmly in place as your grade point average with plenty of kirby grips and some reliable Schwarzkopf Dust Mattifying powder. 

Gentlemen, get a side parting. It performs, it proclaims, it pontificates, it does other words beginning with ‘p’, and you’re bound to look like a slightly dweebier Clark Kent. No spandex required (unless that’s what you’re into). 

Satchels are a necessity. One flung over your shoulder will not only throw you slightly off balance, it’ll fling you right into the library (metaphorically). A colour pop satchel shows you’re NASA material – but you’re down to earth, too. The iconic Cambridge Satchel Company have a huge selection. We like the Fluro selection in green; you’ll be raving about your grades.  Not only does a satchel give you that sexy scholarly edge, leather in general is just plain sexy  – see 50 Shades of Grey for a variety of other practical, everyday Geather accessories.

A pair of well-fitted chinos is a must. Uniqlo do a great variety of affordable Chinos for both sexes, with clean lines and a clear sense of style. Real-life smartypants. Team with a Boden ‘Dark Grey Herringbone’ Blazer, or rip-off thereof, and you’ll be fortunate enough to look like half the St Andrews’ student population. Only the intelligent half, of course.

Your new look won’t sell itself, however (shocking, I know, you look so Dean’s List). Ensure you suitably complement your appearance. Memorise a bank of random facts and trivia to insert into everyday conversation. For example: did you know that a cockroach can survive for nine days without its head? You didn’t? That’s why you’re dressed like a munter. 

Work the Look:

You are beyond mere mortals – you are the super student. Take pleasure in the fact that no one will ever, and I mean, like, ever, be as smart as you. Unless they’ve also read this article – then they might be, which would be pretty awkward for you. Don’t just stop at the main library, show off your intellectual prowess in St Mary’s Library; King James’ Library; the JF Allen Library; you could even travel to the depths of Cupar Public Library if you want to lecture locals. You’re pretty much smart enough to be studying all the subjects – only you don’t need to study anymore; you only have to dress smart to think smart, right? Challenge accepted.

Photo ©Anna Gudnason