India Doyle: ghostbuster extraordinaire

Fourth year is scary. It’s scary for a number of reasons. My flatmates this year do yoga, which means I wake up to an American man telling me to ‘feel […]


Fourth year is scary. It’s scary for a number of reasons. My flatmates this year do yoga, which means I wake up to an American man telling me to ‘feel that weekend stretch’, which is disconcerting, especially on a Monday; I’m doing an Old English module, which means that my own language is now foreign to me; my spaceship sized computer keeps making ominous groaning noises; I’ve developed a love for Taylor Swift, which let’s face it, is really fucking scary, and the dog next door keeps howling at night time.

Which brings me to my next point: it’s scary because this year, I’ve decided that St Andrews is haunted. I think this is a result of the fact that I have nothing else to be scared of (bar looming unemployment, though at least there’s unemployment benefits to look forward to). Not that St Andrews has ever been a hot bed of murder, rape and pillage – despite what the newly branded ‘Sinners’ night would have you believe – but after a summer in London, the tranquillity in St Andrews has begun to give me an eerie feeling.

This paranoia came to a creepy climax when some friends and I were taking a late night jaunt along the pier. What I can only assume was the pyromaniac society were brandishing flames on East Sands, and as we walked towards the pier I could see a man standing, looking solemnly out to the sea. He was further up the pier, so we sat down on the wall. When we left, and this is 100 per cent legit, he had gone. But he hadn’t walked past us, which means that he must have vanished; and if he had vanished, he must have been a ghost.

The evidence is fairly conclusive. But for those cynics amongst you, I found a great website about how to track down ghosts so you guys can do it yourself, or come with me. I’m going to do some tracking this week.
So these are the most important parts of the ghost hunting code: 

1. Addicting habits can be contradictory to your ghostly pursuits.
Aside from the sketchy language, this seems pretty straightforward. Don’t get wasted and try and find a ghost; don’t get high and try and find a ghost and don’t, for the love of God, go ghost hunting if you have an abnormal sex drive (so dictates www.ghoststudy.com, which may rule quite a lot of you out).

2. Use religious relics and symbols as protection. 
That’s easy, everyone grab the crucifix they keep above their bed.

3. Never leave a team member behind, ever.
So don’t go hunting with anyone who can’t run, or who hasn’t got your back – bro.

4. Always remember, you are the one in control.
I will.
These four points take me nicely to around 500 words which is where we must part. Stay tuned for the results of Ghost Busting next week. In the meantime, enjoy Taylor.