There are 11 pandemic personalities in Soton and you’re definitely one of them

Let’s be real here

Getting used to online learning has been a bit of a weird one. Some people are thriving and others not so much. We’re still enjoying the luxuries of tier one restrictions, so the thought of taking away pubs and socialising with different households seems like a scary thought – and perhaps a distant one for some people.  This new student lifestyle is certainly not one we expected – and arguably not worth the money – but we’ve taken a look at how Soton students are adapting to this new way of life.

Whether you’re throwing yourself into all your readings, or totally ignoring they exist, we’ve rounded up the 11 pandemic personalities in Soton and you’ll definitely identify with at least one of them.

The heavy drinkers

A common personality type for Soton students, and arguably one of the best. You’re always up for a good time and can normally be found downing a a bucket in Jesters or sparked out on your sofa after a few too many shots.

Your mates question whether you are ever actually sober because everything can be fixed by a trip to the pub in your opinion so obviously you’re there pretty much every day. The Gordon Arms is one of your favourites and you’ve made friends with pretty much all the bar staff at this point – I mean, why not, they’re lovely.

It’s never too early to start drinking and the 10pm curfew doesn’t stop you from getting wasted and stumbling through Portswood – just happens earlier now.

The introverts

Spending the day in your house with the perfect excuse to not see anyone sounds like heaven to you. You’ve adjusted remarkably well to the pandemic – perhaps a little too well – and happily while away the hours in your room doing… well whatever you want really.

Some people have been in this category for a while but there are certainly plenty of new comers. Maybe you’ve picked up a new hobby, a new disgust of people or maybe you just can’t deal with the world without a proper night out in Jesters.

The nature walkers

If your Instagram is still aesthetically pleasing despite the pandemic, full of vibrant photos from day trips to the New Forest or picnics on the common then this is the category for you. You’ve scoured the Internet for local gem destinations and tirelessly beg your friends to go with you.

You are planning your next trip in your head right now – stargazing anyone?

The TikTokers

You’re constantly checking your TikTok for new followers and are on it with the new trends. You basically think you’re famous and annoy your housemates by having sounds on repeat until you get that dance absolutely perfect for your followers.

You will happily spend time finding the perfect backdrop for your next video whether it’s in the middle of Portswood Sainsburys or looking out at sea in Ocean Village. Normally, you have to bribe one of your friends to come help film it for you and then blame most of your mistakes on them.

The hard workers

Your degree is reaping the benefits if you are in this category. Spending endless hours doing every reading, extension tasks and coursework the moment its set – you are well and truly loving the independent learning lifestyle.

Hartley is your favourite place to be but spending two hours a day there is just not enough for you so you’ve recreated the comforting environment in your own home by sending passive aggressive text messages to your housemates if they dare make a noise whilst you are working.

You’re what most students aspire to be – maybe not passive aggressive but we can ignore that.

The no workers

The total opposite of the hard workers – you have barely looked at your work since you came back to Soton. You probably don’t know what a break-out room is and you don’t really care. You spend your days totally chilled out and make your housemates question how you even got into Soton in the first place.

You’ve got no idea how to log in to your online lectures and the only thing you miss about campus is karaoke at Stag’s. You  normally fit into another category like heavy drinkers or introverts, at least we hope you do because what else are you doing all day?

The fitness gurus

You completed every fitness trend during lockdown and you’re constantly filling your Instagram story with #runningviews (we get it, the common is pretty). You spent most of your money on gym clothes and home fitness equipment so you’re totally prepared to go into tier two or three restrictions.

People normally find you in PureGym or Jubilee or running down Portswood Road so that everyone can see how fit and healthy you are – you know, just in case they don’t see your Instagram.

The coffee shop enthusiasts

Making full use of their coffee subscription, you can normally be found hiding out in the Pret on campus. In fact you probably spend more time in cafes than you do in your actual house. Your friends come to you for advice on the best place to coffee in Portswood and you give them a full blown review of every one, or just show them your TripAdvisor account so they can read your ratings on each of them.

Maybe you’re trying to fill the lecture theatre sized hole in your life. Maybe you just really like coffee.

The night owls

If you barely see daylight, chances are this is the category for you. Your housemates were worried about you but the remains of your midnight breakfast from Tariq Manzils tells them that you’re doing ok. You tell yourself you’re most productive during the night but you normally end up getting distracted anyway.

You’re the type of person who’ll not reply for days on end because no one’s awake when you are anyway. All the curfew has done for you is made it quieter when you go outside – it’s seriously creepy seeing Portswood silent at 2am, although you don’t miss the drunken antics of others people so much.

The masterchefs

A new found love of cooking or baking lands you in this category. Whether you’re actually good at it is another matter, but you’re trying at least. You spend your time in the kitchen making a mess or watching cooking videos online. You friends either love your food or hate it, if there’s a middle ground they’re just being polite.

Just stop making banana bread, ok?

The online shoppers

Every day there’s a new parcel arriving at your door which makes everyone question where you get your money from. Another Pretty Little Thing parcel? Really? You’ve also made friends with the people in the post office on campus with the amount of things you return.

You leave strict instructions for delivery because you can never be too careful in Portswood and write complaints back to companies when the instructions aren’t followed.

Related stories recommended by this writer:

‘I vommed on the Interchange map’: Soton students’ nastiest Freshers’ week stories

What your Jesters drink of choice says about you

Grab life by the boobs: Meet Southampton’s Uni Boob Team