Every question you get asked being from Ascot or Windsor

No, we do not know the Queen

Is your house big?

Not every house in Ascot and Windsor is a mansion.

Do you go to private school?

There's five in Ascot alone…they're hard to avoid.

Have you met the Queen?

Despite being neighbours, she's never in! I think she prefers Buckingham Palace.

Do you own a horse?

No, just because we live near Ascot racecourse does not mean we own a £40,000 racehorse that we enter in Royal Ascot. We only get ponies for Christmas.

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Are you rich then?

No, I spent my trust fund.

Are you a conservative?

Does it matter?

Do you go to Royal Ascot?

Probably, along with 300,000 other people. Although, the population of Ascot and Windsor is 224,023…

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What do your parents do?

Last time I checked they weren't Doctors or Politicians.